Puttering through life

Kananaskis Country beckoned us into its midst with the promise of beautiful views, fresh air and sunshine. We took a short drive from the city into the wilderness of the foothills. Our destination was Elbow Falls. The roads were quiet and clear until we arrived at the falls. Lining the road before the closed park gates were cars filled with backcountry hikers and snowshoers. I guess we weren't the only ones hearing the call of good weather and the countryside.

The parking lot for the falls was deserted. We donned some warm clothes (the wind was still chilly) and ventured onto the hard-packed trail. We quickly found ourselves at a viewing point (not much of a hiking trail) but the river was lovely. We wandered at a snail's pace to the last viewing point and discovered the following scene.

The picture doesn't quite capture the reality of the moment but add extra blue to the sky, the sound of a river rushing over rocks, crisp air and warm sunshine and you can get a pretty good idea of the peace we felt at being near nature. We took our time at Elbow Falls to allow the wee people to play in the snow (eating it and throwing some into the river). A few other people viewed the falls but none seemed to relish the moment as much as us (perhaps the guy wearing shorts and sandals didn't realize it wasn't even spring yet).

The day was capped off with lunch in the hamlet of Bragg Creek. The kids behaved themselves very well (even if lil bug thought she might have a starvation meltdown when we first arrived until I pulled out snacks to tide her over until lunch was served). We took a few minutes to wander around the local shops and hopped into the car to return to the city.

Getting out of the city was a much needed break from the everyday. Three cheers to sunny days and local attractions.

Sunny days, sweepin' the clouds away, on my way to where the air is sweet ...

Ahh, that lovely Sesame Street theme song is spinning around in my head as I sit here bathed in glorious warm sunshine pouring through our west facing balcony doors. Unlike the rest of the country, Alberta is experiencing a reprieve from the chill and snow of winter. Our current temperature is a balmy 7ºC, tomorrow's forecast high is 10ºC and (hold onto your hats) Sunday's temperature is suppose to reach 13ºC. Yep, this is one reason I love Alberta weather. Winter can be nice. Warm winter temperatures almost cancel out the effect of the ferocious winds. It is without a doubt that warmer temperatures seduce you into wanting to be outdoors trying different sports.

Coincidentally, monkey boy's preschool held its winter play day this morning. Teachers, students, parents and siblings delighted in sliding down hills, skating, and hot chocolate on this warm day. Unfortunately, monkey boy's cautious nature meant we risked collision with other tobogganers in order to let him sled from half way down the hill instead of the top. His hesitancy also meant that we quit a little earlier than the rest. Yet I found a positive in his unwillingness to participate in activities like the others kids. I re-discovered that he is perfectly capable of being independent. He has a remarkable ability to occupy himself. He and his sister entertained themselves with some spray bottles filled with coloured water. He did not hesitate to enjoy an ice rink just because he lacked skates or helmet (or because his folks refuse to purchase more winter paraphernalia that they would have to ship to Ottawa in June). Although I missed the opportunity to have more social contact with adults, I did enjoy spending the morning outside with my two favourite wee people. Plus I did manage to have some adult contact once we went inside for hot chocolate and goodies. I'm stepping outside of myself and just pursuing conversation whenever the opportunity arises. It is fun getting to know people and what they do.

My next project is to figure out how to enjoy the weather this weekend...trip to the mountains, road trip to a nearby attraction. Finally the opportunities seem endless instead of prohibited by bad roads and bad tempers.

Birthdays seem to lay a mixed bag of emotions into my lap. I like celebrating other people's birthdays. I love celebrating monkey boy's and lil bug's birthdays. I am always pleased to have a birthday. Counting down my years in this life does not bother or perplex me. I am always flattered, thrilled and delighted to hear from family and friends.

I just always find myself a wee bit melancholy. Sometimes I chalk up my mood to winter weather or being far from family on my birthday but I don't think that is all of it. This year I find myself basking in sunshine and warmer temperatures along with the company of family nearby and yet I feel grumpy, irritable, and sad. Perhaps I allow myself too much time to reminisce and over-analyze my current state of affairs.

Don't get me wrong, I have a good life. I love my spouse, children, family and friends. My job (which is on hold for me until my return from this sabbatical) may not always be fulfilling but it satisfies my need to work and bring in some money. Yet I fret and think I desire other things (unnamed and unknown).

Thankfully I know this funk will eventually fade. Hopefully I will come to terms with some of my short-comings and build up some plans to inspire and motivate me. I usually do. I just hate meandering through the swamp of melancholy in order to find a sense of peace. I dislike how my mood effects others. Today, my birthday, I will remind myself to enjoy the sunshine rather than wallow in the muddy slush it creates.

I'm here.

I exist.

I just lost my creativity somewhere. Sending out a search party right now. Will report in on results soon.

In meantime, here is a brief utilitarian update:

Christmas was great. Had fun with family. The kids were spoiled. Tired of driving Alberta highways in the winter.

New Year's was quiet. J and I played on the computer (our separate computers). Managed to steal a new year's kiss though. Main goal for 2009 is to make time for myself and time for J a priority.

I love returning to the routine of life, i.e. preschool, errands, groceries, library visits, gymnastics for kids and occasional museum trips (Telus World of Science keeps the kids busy but it just does not live up to the expectations I have created based on frequenting museums in the Nation's Capital).

Excited about my trip to Ottawa Jan 26 to 28. And even more excited about my trip with some girlfriends to Dublin Jan 28 to Feb 2. Very, very excited.

The kids are both endearing and infuriating.

Experienced a stark realization, our time in Alberta is quickly vanishing. There are so many projects I want to work on and finish (knitting, photo albums, memory books), so many places I want to visit with the kids (Head Smashed in Buffalo Jump, Kananaskis country, Tyrell Museum in Drumheller, Fort Calgary, Reynolds Alberta Museum) and so many experiences I hope to fit in (cross country skiing, hiking near Canmore, horseback riding, etc).

I have laryngitis. It started Friday afternoon along with a monster headache and it has only been in the last few hours that I can talk above a whisper. It has been a challenge to reign myself in from commenting on my children's play, behaviour and squabbles. Perhaps it is a good lesson to use my words a little more wisely and efficiently (at least in the verbal realm, as we all know I can't stop my overzealous use of words in my writing).

Now laryngitis shouldn't have put a stop to my creating family memories in our lead up to Christmas but combined with -21 to -27 degree celsius weather, I decided to forego the outing to view the Christmas lights display on 14th Ave near Confederation Park. I also lost any desire to go on a shopping trip to purchase birdseed and then create a feeder with the kids. I really just did not have it in me to be any more ambitious than wasting some time at the nearby Chapters on Saturday or to venture outside and play for 10 minutes today.

I did manage to finish most of my Christmas cards. J put together a great picture collage of the kids combined with some witty text. I will hold off posting the card here as I am sending the card to the one or two readers that check out my blog (sometimes surprises can be nice).

I am almost done all my baking. Here is the current tally of yummy goodies sitting in my freezer ready to be doled out to family and friends:
-nuts and bolts
-mocha frosted cookies
-pecan balls (as this is a personal favourite of my mom and son, we are on batch #2)
-gingersnap cookies
-pinwheel cookies
-coffee cheesecake squares
-caramel squares

I still need to make some pistachio cocoa nib cookies and sugar cookies. I am stalling on making my famous (per my fellow co-workers opinion poll) sugar cookies (the secret is in the icing) until we go to my in-laws. My mom-in-law is the sugar cookie expert and loves to get the kids to help bake and decorate.

So hopefully this case of laryngitis is on the way out the door as the countdown to Christmas quickly evaporates into thin air. I'm just glad that the only shopping that I have left is for my husband...though this may prove to be the most difficult task I have left on my to do list.

On Day 11, lil bug was thankfully napping away her grumpiness, so monkey boy and I found some time to work with on a pre-packaged foamy project. Personally, I'm a pretty crafty kind of gal. Heck I made over 100 place settings of tiny flower pots filled with plaster in order to support a hand crafted wire spiral which in turn held a paper flower printed with a quote for our wedding day. A little over zealous on my part but my roomate at the time helped with finishing it as well as finding time to mock me in a good natured way.

However, I now have 2 kids under 5 years of age. I don't have the luxury or desire to develop my own craft idea, purchase the supplies, or be patient with setting it up. I have grown to like the instant kits, especially when they involve foamy pieces with adhesive already on the back. The downfall is sometimes they don't always stick but a little glue or willingness to try another one seems to solve that problem.

So monkey boy and I created some Christmas trees. He found it very amusing that we were making Christmas trees for the Christmas tree. I love the fact that he is starting to see the humour in life's little things.


Day 12 of our family advent calendar focused on decorating again. This time with lil bug. I have fortunately re-connected with a friend (my birthday twin) from my college days. She has two children as well and we are both recent Calgary inhabitants. We have been trying to get together with our youngest kids on a regular basis while the older ones are in school or pre-school. Yesterday she arranged for us to have the kids decorate gingerbread cookies. After lil bug overcame her shyness and indignation over going somewhere she thought she didn't want to go, we had a good time watching them paint their cookies and eat their way through candies. Lil bug's final assessment was "that wuz fun".