Puttering through life

Long weekend begins

2011-09-08T15:51:00.000-07:00

My folks arrived last night...just in time to take care of the kids while we toddle off to Boston. Weather prediction is good, only commitment is our concert on Friday night, no specific plans...things are looking good. We are sitting in the Porter lounge waiting for our connecting flight. Btw Porter rocks. They serve coffee, tea, cookies, pop all in a very comfortable setting. Plus they actually serve real food on the flights and even offer free glasses of wine. I think I have glimpsed a little bit of fine living.

10 years

2011-07-20T20:13:00.000-07:00

J & I celebrated our 10 year wedding anniversary today and I discovered he can still surprise me. He grabbed lunch for us and we ate the sandwiches outside by the river at work (it is nice to work at the same place). He presented me with a large manila envelope that contained a cartoon that depicted J giving me tickets to see (enter the drum roll here) The National in (hold your breath and be as surprised as I was) Boston.

I was speechless. We are flying out of town for a weekend to see a band live in concert. I feel like a young jet setting couple!

I love J so much for all the support, patience, encouragement and love he gives me. He rocks my world!

Seven

2011-05-17T19:15:00.000-07:00

Monkey boy is seven now. Seven years! Holy crap, seven years! I still remember holding his wee body, panicking about the cries, and patting his back for hours while we tried to have him return to sleep in his crib. I still relish that sweet feeling of having him nap on my chest or seeing him sprawled between J and I with one of his hands touching me and the other touching J.

We marveled at his ability to commando crawl, walk, use sign language and talk. There were endless treks around the bed with his cars, constant talk about cars and trucks, and demands to drive on the busy highway.

There were a few years of anxiety over transitions and although the anxiety can reappear he has learned to cope and become confident. He has traveled to Alberta (several times), Mexico, Rome, and Montreal. He continues to snuggle with us but these occasions are fewer and farther between than in the past. He still needs his baby Clarence (stuffed monkey) and Pipsqueak (stuffed dog) along with a clock and night light in order to sleep. He has fallen in love with sports especially soccer. He loves the outdoors and being active. He is obsessed with playing electronic games (Xbox Kinect and Leapworld). He enjoys playing with his sister even if he has a lot of rules.

He is kind, loving, silly, and creative.

He is my monkey boy and I love him so.

4 year old sayings

2011-05-17T19:00:00.001-07:00

Someone reminded me that I should write down some of the cool things my lil bug says before I forget. In the last two weeks, my girlie has said the following:

Lil bug: Momma, I'm falling in love with you right now.
Me: How come?
Lil bug: I don't know, I just am

Lil bug: Why do we have weather? (asked at 7:30am while looking at the rainy day)
Me: (brief explanation about how this is earth and that we have temperature and pressure changes, yadda, yadda)
Lil bug: I know how it rains. The clouds puff together, they puff and puff and puff, then they get dark and it rains.

Lil bug: Let's horsey wrestle
Me: What is horse wrestling?
Lil bug: We are horses that wrestle.
Me: Okay
Lil bug: I'll be pink pony and you be red bird. I'm going to get you.

Plus a few other things, but guess what I forgot already. These special years are going by too fast.

Almost the best

2011-04-23T21:08:00.000-07:00

Bedtime with my lil bug is the best part of the day. Books have been read, lights are out and she asks me to snuggle with her for "let me count first,one, two, three...eleven. Oh that is too much, so ten minutes". Now snuggle time is not necessarily filled with sweet, endearing cuddles. It usually starts out with a litany of words. This is the time she rewinds her mind, spills her little heart out and figures out her next day. It is a great time to find out how she feels about things and what is bothering her. I often have to cut her off with a stern "okay we only have 5 minutes left". This is usually followed by kisses (now don't kiss me mom, I'm going to kiss you on the forehead)and huggies. Then all of a sudden she stops, she often puts her wee face directly into mine, flings her arm around my neck or uses my arm as a snuggle toy and then she starts snoring. It really is hilarious and wonderful.

The other night her litany words worked there way into telling me the following:

Lil bug: Momma you are almost the best
Me: I'm almost the best
Lil bug: Not quite momma but almost, I still love you though
Me: I love you too and you are the best to me
Lil bug: I'm the best, bester than my daddy
Me: Daddy is my best husband
Lil bug: Am I the best more than my brother?
Me: Your brother is my best son and you are my best daughter
Lil bug: Oh well you are almost the best

Now I did not worry about being almost the best as I knew I had been downgraded for the injustice I imposed earlier in the day. I said no to getting her more paints after I just finished letting her paint and told her I needed some time to sit and finish my tea. Well that no must have been devastating considering the meltdown she had and the ultimatum she had imposed "I won't stop crying until you get me more paint". I will give her credit she managed to pour out the tears for 30 minutes. It was a bad moment but she did manage to apologize later in the day saying I'm sorry I didn't stop crying but I was angry with you.

Aah the joys of being almost the best.

It ain't so bad...really

2011-04-10T19:22:00.000-07:00

This blog does not receive enough attention. It is a good indicator about how I treat myself. I do not give myself enough time and care. For instance, this winter has been a crappy one health wise for me. I have had either a head cold or flu at least once a month starting in October. Two colds turned into strep throat with the second case requiring a stronger antibiotic one week after I finished the first round of antibiotics. This week to my joy and denial my monthly head cold became walking pneumonia. I feel okay other than achy shoulders, a wicked cough and lungs that feel like they are being squeezed in a very gentle but annoying way.

Today I'm grumpy and feeling sorry for myself. My body is telling me to slow down and smell the flowers. My head keeps spinning. I feel driven to run the treadmill of life because I want some form of control, some benefits. Well those benefits result in colds and a stupid self imposed schedule:
5:45am haul butt out of bed
7:00am board bus for the best half hour of my day...I read or knit and watch the sun rise or fill the sky
7:35am start work
4:00pm run to catch 4:06 bus (only to find bus full of university students who feel that their 10 minute ride must mean they have the limited number of seats). Note some days J is working at the university too...we can drive home together...I can breath
4:45pm I am home (if J not at university, he has picked up the kids cuz as usual I'm running late)
5:45pm food enters belly
6:00pm dishes (no dishwasher in our house...egad I live in the dark ages)
6:30pm play time with the kids.
8:00pm kids in bed but guilty mom still snuggles with her lil bug
8:30pm lunches and one household chore to keep up with things (Monday dust living room, Tuesday scrub kitchen floor and front hall, Wednesday laundry, Thursday garbage and dust bedroom, Friday no chores)
9:45pm flicking channels (nothing on as TV programs kind of suck lately and we don't have cable)
10:30pm bed and book
11:00pm or later sleep
hit repeat times 5 until Saturday where life is slightly more leisurely once you clean the bathrooms, do the laundry, go for groceries and vacuum.

Yet there is reason for optimism. Spring is here. My bike is ready to start being my "bus" to and from work (just have to get rid of my pneumonia first). The kids, J and I are loving the outdoors. Backyard is racked and holds promise (though in reality we need to overhaul it and plant some grass...but there is something rustic and natural about packed dirt and weeds). My monkey boy is turning 7 very soon, we are going to Fredericton NB pretty soon, and our annual trip to Alberta is booked.

I just need tell myself to step off the treadmill, stop making to do lists at 5am in the morning and find some flowers to smell (crocus' look out!).

Christmas Magic

2010-11-18T18:54:00.000-08:00

While walking home from the care provider we passed a house with their Christmas light display on and this prompted the following two conversations which occurred at the same time:

Lil bug: How does Santa get into our house? Monkey Boy: Do reindeer really fly?

Me: I like to think that Santa's reindeer can fly.

Monkey: How do they fly? Are there people with metal poles pushing them up?

Me(slightly puzzled and distracted by the conversation with lil bug): Umm, I don't think there are poles. I'm sure they can really fly because of magic...what were you saying bug...

lil bug: I bet Santa will come down the chimney to get to our house but I hope he doesn't get all dirty

Me: I don't think he will to get dirty. He is magical.

lil bug: maybe, maybe we can ask him to clean the chimney when he visits so he doesn't get dirty and we can have a clean chimney...that's a good idea right

Monkey: yah that is a good idea we should leave him a note and some apples for the reindeer

Me (going back to the flying reindeer conversation as it dawned on me that metal poles and people pushing reindeer sounded a little odd): monkey, how do you think reindeer fly...with poles?

Monkey: maybe there are people who have metal poles attached to the reindeer and they push them up while running or they drive in their cars to go faster.

Me (seeing some weird dr. suess sculpture picture in my mind's eye): do you mean that the reindeer are wood or metal statutes?

Monkey: no, they are real but people hold them up...or maybe they have tiny wings that help them fly ... or no jet engines that come out of there bodies and send them flying

Me: wow those are great ideas. I'm not sure what really happens though. I think only Santa knows.

Monkey: when we write a letter to Santa this year I'm going to ask him how the reindeer fly and then he will write me back with the answer.

Me: good idea, can we go inside now and make supper.

Monkey and bug: YAH!

Apple Orchard

2010-09-12T20:40:00.000-07:00

Annual trip to an apple orchard was a success. We went with some dear friends, picked lots of apples, and enjoyed this weekends' one day of sunshine in the countryside. We tried a different orchard this year. Although we like Mountain Orchards (in particular their apple cider donuts), we decided to try Kilmarnock Orchard. It is just outside the quaint village of Merrickville. It was a good orchard - clean, healthy trees, and equipped with a couple of kubotas pulling wagons. I missed the donuts and the larger selection of trees tall enough for ladders. However I would go again as the crowds were minimal, the location was great (right on the river, we even had to cross a swing bridge over the Rideau canal), and the apples are good (Bug ate a good portion of five).

We capped the day off at the local chip wagon for a family-sized container of fries. We also squeezed in a trip to the ice cream store in Merrickville. I had Indian Chai Latte, J had Key Lime Passionfruit, Monkey had vanilla with sprinkles and Bug ate a whole Crazy Kids (vanilla with oreo cookies, sprinkles, etc).

The only thing left to do is use the apples. I see apple crisp, apple pie, apple sauce, butternut squash and apple soup, apple muffins, etc in my near future. Good thing my bug was helping me this morning with the peeling and coring.

First day of Grade One

2010-09-07T19:51:00.000-07:00

My monkey boy has started grade one. It was a grand day of firsts. First time on the school bus, first time at a proper school, first time taking a lunch, first recess, first school desk, first great day.

Our evening conversation (one of many):
Monkey Boy (MB): School wasn't like what I dreamed.
Me: Is that a good thing or a bad thing?
MB: Good. It was better than I thought it would be.
Me: What did you like the best?
MB: Recess, I found my friends M (cool neighbour girl who is one grade higher) and R (neighbour boy and care provider's son who is also in grade one but a different class). We played together. I wasn't alone.
Me: Wow, was there anything else you liked?
MB: Everything. I'm so excited about going to school tomorrow.

Nonetheless I am one thrilled momma. I was worried that his anxieties would override his enjoyment, that he would feel out of his element, that he would spend the day trying to keep his fear pushed down under the surface. I didn't need to worry. He was nervous and jittery. Yet he had such great moments that made it a great day for him.

His kindergarten teacher (who taught him at his daycare last year) took the time to insure his new teacher understood his potential anxieties and to impart to her that Nevan is a great kid to teach. His previous teacher even came over to him to greet him, wish him luck and enjoy one of his hugs.

His confident well-spoken gal pal from next door sought him out before and during school. Their friendship might change as they age and become entrenched in other friendships but right now it enables him to find a place in the playground. They even spent their time jumping on the trampoline tonight talking about working on their playfort at school.

He liked having lunch and snack at school. He is already talking about the fun "play day" scheduled in the near future. He liked having a desk all to himself.

My monkey boy has started on his journey to knowledge and independance. He is truly excited. I love him. I love having a six year old boy.

Hot Air Balloons

2010-09-07T19:47:00.000-07:00

Crisp air, cool temperature, hints of sunlight, happy kids ... rising early to watch the hot air balloons take flight was so worth it.

best mom

2010-09-01T19:23:00.000-07:00

"You are the bestest mother ever momma" as declared by monkey boy today.

Might have something to do with taking him and his sister out of care early to do the following:
visit to new school prior to classes starting tuesday sept7
dairy queen treats
swim at local public pool
long tv night viewing
cookie dough
non-yelling mom!

Lost tooth

2010-08-12T20:17:00.000-07:00

My monkey boy lost his first tooth today. Holy crap we are entering a new phase in his life! Now to come up with something clever from the tooth fairy.

Update

2010-04-04T19:17:00.000-07:00

FYI I haven't gone postal at my workplace despite the tone of my last post of many months ago.

I've been busy with the regular stuff of life...work, kids, house, and the juggling act these elements of life require. Our renos are done (more or less). A post with the details on this event is forthcoming. As a teaser though I must say our colour choice rocks, our flooring is awesome and we now have a very livable space.

Today's post though is about family and Easter. We are not an overly religious household. We observe the holidays but in a fairly secular way. The focus today was the Easter bunny. There wasn't too much pomp or fanfare but it was a nice day, especially since we are experiencing warm temperatures (around 20 degrees celsius).

My folks are in town which is a real treat. It is the first Easter they have spent with our kids. Monkey boy and lil bug woke at their usual 7am time (our boy has a very defined inner clock). I had placed gifts from our siblings and the cards from our parents out on the dining table. They had a hoot checking out the loot they received...pez dispensers, books, bracelet and clothes were quickly viewed and checked out. It was enough to keep them in check until the grandparents emerged from our luxurious basement (again a teaser for a future post).

They received cards from both sets of grandparents containing money (which my little shoppers always like to have in their clutches...Monkey can save and budget but lil bug will spend quickly). Then it was on to the treasure hunt. I love this part. I created easter bunny faces, commissioned J and my folks to decorate them and I wrote a clue on the back. It was so much fun watching them run around the house finding clues and then the treasure from the Easter bunny. This year I gave them a basket filled with a book, clothing and outdoor toy purchased on my line of credit at a consignment store (I love boom kids here in Ottawa). I also gave them each some much needed socks, activity sticker book and a chocolate Easter egg perched inside a egg cup from Laura Secord. Yup I spoil them and there was even more to come.

I forced the kids to eat a bran muffin and some fruit before they could venture into the backyard to find all of the colourful eggs the Easter bunny left behind. This too was a hoot to do for them. This was such a fun part of the morning that I wished I had more eggs to hide just to see the pleasure on their faces when they discovered a hiding spot. Thanks to my mom, who stuffed lil bug's eggs with mini-Oreo cookies and monkey's with licorice and then labelled them with their first initial, this event went smoothly without a single child bickering or crying.

The adults were finally given a turn to have breakfast and the children relaxed in the house enjoying way too much junk and a little t.v. time. After the dishes were done my mom took the kids out biking. You would think this would be an ideal time for the rest of us to relax. Well that wasn't in the agenda. J worked on putting marmoleum (again this eludes to my future reno project post) down in our front entrance area. This meant cutting the marmoleum to the right size and removing the existing 1960's lino from the entrance. A bigger job than anyone expected especially considering he still isn't done removing the paper backing from the floor.

My dad and I spent the better part of the day assembling a treat J and I have been wanting to get the kids since last summer. We bought a trampoline (a springfree trampoline). I purchased the oval (8'x13') sized trampoline. I tried to find a second hand one but it seems like that I wasn't the only one wanting one. There were 10 wanted postings last time I checked on usedottawa and not a single large sized safe tramp for sale. So I decided to try Costco. This particular brand has typically been carried by Costco but when I checked with them they did not have any on order.

I decided to go directly to the company. I spoke with some very informed customer service people. One told me about the product and let me know that Costco hadn't ordered any this year. She then passed me onto the order department. I was willing to fork over some money for the product depending on the shipping costs. The kind person on the other end asked which ones I was looking at and then recommended I not purchase through them but order them through Sears.ca or Canadian Tire. She said not only were they cheaper than their pricing but I could also avoid shipping costs. Now that is true customer service. I put one of the few remaining trampolines on hold at our nearby crabby tire (I say this cuz the service although not unpleasant is so agonizingly slow). Dad and I started the assembly process around 10am, took a break at 12:30, resumed at 2pm and finished by 3pm. Yup not exactly a quick process considering my mom and J both helped with the rod installation while I fed the kids and prepared an adult lunch from 11:45-12:30.

Despite the cost and long set up time, the trampoline is terrific. Both kids loved it. Monkey boy has already figured out how to seat and stand up in a bounce (quite a feat for a kid who hasn't spent much time on a trampoline). Our neighbours also joined in the fun. They have two girls. One is a year older than monkey and the other is the same age as bug. We cut a hole in the fence between our yards so they could play more. So far it is working out, even though our youngest both tend to be strong-willed.

All in all a great but exhausting day. I love family and creating memories.

Frackin' co-workers

2010-01-14T07:34:00.000-08:00

Okay I am at work and I should not be blogging. I hardly blog cuz I don't have time even at home. But I am mad. No, that is understated. This requires upper case: I AM MAD!!!! Why are some people such bitches?!!!!! Perhaps some people should be required to partake in a basic course on how to be civil and diplomatic when approaching you with problems. I don't need confrontation or rudeness. Frack, I am probably one of the nicest goddamn people around but that does not mean you can walk over me. She frackin knows that I will bend over backwards to make things work right. BITCH!!!

Okay that feels better. Must go cuz as I said I am way too busy.

Gingerbread people

2009-12-07T19:38:00.000-08:00

I cheated. I feel a tad guilty. I really am a good baker. I have no time anymore. This sucks. I must confess to using (gulp)pre-made gingerbread dough to make gingerbread people and other Christmas decorations.

I can make the stuff, honest! My excuse is two-fold. I've been busy trying to keep two children fed, happy and entertained. I've also been busy prepping the house for renovations (which started today...YAH...super exciting...you should see the mess...aaagh...renos are for another post...don't have time here...MUST FOCUS!).

Anyway I bought some Pillsbury cookie dough in roll. To be honest it worked fine for my purposes. The kids adore baking but we needed some instant results tonight, especially considering we didn't get home until 5:45pm and our supper of left-overs didn't fully reach our bellies until 6:30 pm. We rolled and cut the dough. We even found a few pieces of raw dough making it to our mouths (always a secret pleasure of mine). The cookies took minutes to bake and kept their shape. When we went to decorate them, I realized I was out of icing sugar (used it all for the icing of my mocha frosted drops that I took to a cookie exchange on Friday...again here is another blog worthy topic...I need more time!!). I remembered I had some leftover tubes of icing from a birthday a year or so ago (good thing these bought products have a shelf life that seems to last an eternity). We decorated and devoured the cookies. The event worked but in hindsight it was too rushed and caused too much anxiety. I will have to amend future weekday events to easier projects or activities.

The worst part was that I think the joy of baking was lost tonight, especially when you factor in monkey boy's tears and my anger. Monkey boy decided he didn't like gingerbread cookies and wanted a candy cane instead. I told him I didn't think that was a great idea. He melted down and started crying, moaning and whining. He filled his mind with worry and anxiety over the thought he would have to eat a cookie he didn't like. I told him he could have some candy cane but not much. In his desire to please he said he wouldn't have anything. I became exasperated. I started moaning and whining too. It made him laugh (which is good) but I was done in (perhaps I should also get more than 4 hours of sleep the night before I take on baking, even in its abbreviated form). After what seemed like hours (but in reality was only 5 minutes), we compromised. He decided to decorate a cookie but have some candy cane if he didn't like it. Well he liked the cookie...so did my girl. In the end, they enjoyed rolling and cutting out cookies as well as decorating their one cookie. I hope to have more time to create a better cookie decorating experience in the near future. Usually it is a fun affair but I think I need to be in a better frame of mind and with more than a half an hour to complete the task.

Love of Crafts + Christmas theme = Fun Result

2009-12-07T19:33:00.000-08:00

Crafts are a fan favorite in our household. We can't seem to get enough of them. Today's advent event was naturally a hit. We made paper snowflakes, both blue and white. It was fun watching my boy figure out how patterns were being made and duplicated when you cut a folded piece of paper. Lil bug even had fun with the project but required a little assistance getting her scissors through the thick paper.

My plan is to hang them from ribbon around the house. Haven't actually done that yet but the intention is good.

Santa Claus Parade

2009-12-07T19:17:00.000-08:00

After an early and chaotic supper, we piled into the car to make our way over to OC Transpo's Park and Ride. We hopped onto the 95 route. Several stops later and in a bus crammed full of other families and regular passengers, we arrived downtown. We pushed our stroller (much easier to put lil bug in this contraption versus carrying her 36 pounds and snowsuit clad body around on my hip) down Bay St to Wellington. We conveniently parked ourselves on the North side of the street in front of Library and Archives Canada. Then we waited and waited. Finally we heard the sounds and saw the lights of the Santa Claus Parade.

Monkey boy loved looking at the floats. His favorites were antique fire trucks, and anything with lots of Christmas lights. Both kids thought it was fun to receive candy canes (which they were giving out in copious amounts). Monkey covets candy canes so it was interesting to overhear him say no thanks to one of the firefighters. He told me that he was only suppose to get one so that there were enough for other kids. Cool kid!!!

Unfortunately I neglected to haul the charity gifts we had picked up for the occasion. The kids handle the disappointment well though. We decided it would be okay to just take the toys to toy mountain next time we were at a mall. I did give them some money to put in a stocking that all the firefighters were carrying. It was fun to observe a couple of families approach to the charity aspect of the event. One mother had provided her son with a sock full of change. He seemed to enjoy being able to give to as many firefighters as he could.

The highlight of the parade was Santa of course. Both kids seem to really get the idea this year. Monkey is full of questions about the whole concept. I'm trying to create a mystical feel for him and the girl. Monkey decided that Santa had brought his real sleigh with him and put it on the float. He was a little disappointed that the reindeer weren't there but thankfully a young girl (of about 8 years) had already filled him in on the fact that they were home napping to get ready for Christmas eve. Aaah the falsehoods we tell our children. For some odd reason I can live with this one.

Christmas Music

2009-12-07T18:49:00.000-08:00

We filled our home with different renditions of traditional and not so traditional Christmas music. We have a limited selection of Christmas music. Here is the list of titles we own on CD:

»Barenaked Ladies. Barenaked for the Holidays.
»"A Charlie Brown Christmas" featuring the famous PEANUTS characters. Original sound track Vince Guaraldi.
»Bruce Cockburn. Christmas.
»The Edge of Christmas. (compilation including Pretenders Pat Benatar, Queen, Kate Bush, Pogues, Ramones)
»David Francey. Carols for a Christmas Eve.
»How the Grinch Stole Christmas.
»Loreena McKennitt. To Drive the Cold Winter Away.
»Sarah McLachlan. Wintersong
»The Promise of Ages : a Christmas Collection. Andrew Parrott, Taverner Consort & Choir.

David Francey, Barenaked Ladies, and Bruce Cockburn get the most air time in our home. The kids tend to favour tunes like jingle bells. Jingle Bells can be an annoying little tune when you hear your children repetitively singing it.

We enjoyed listening, singing, dancing and rocking to the music. It definitely put us in the Christmas mood. Though I think we need to invest in acquiring a broader selection of tunes.

Letter to Santa

2009-12-03T20:48:00.000-08:00

We worked on letters to Santa tonight. They started by decorating a card. My bug who is quite prolific when it comes to crafts, was on card number three by the time I encouraged her to tell me what to write.

Monkey boy on the other hand has become quite thoughtful in his craft design. He even decorated the inside margins. He chose to write his own letter this year. I said the words, he attempted to figure out the spelling and when stuck I gave him the letters. I wrote one word as I needed to speed up the process as the clock was striking 8:15pm.

Both the kids and I are enjoying our Christmas countdown though I am finding it hard to work in activities during the short period of time we have in the evenings. Oh well, it gives our evenings a little more focus and before you know it we are off to bed.

Giving

2009-12-02T17:25:00.000-08:00

Today's event was to buy a Christmas gift that we could donate to a child in need.

I want to instill in my children a sense of responsibility, respect and understanding towards the needs of others. I've explained to them that we share and give to others because it shows we care. Sometimes I wonder if they are grasping the concept. They are only 5 and 3 years old.

When I presented the event to them tonight, they accepted the mission with gusto. They each began to talk about what they wanted to give. Monkey boy's response was quite interesting. He talked about how it is good to give to people who don't have as much as us. In our conversation he even explained to me that sometimes families had to buy their kids had clothes and food first and didn't have enough money for toys. My young man chatted away about what he wanted to give a child. I was paying attention but also trying to figure out the logistics of getting everything done until a comment of his stopped me in my tracks. Monkey boy asked how we were going to pay for the gift. Before I could explain how it would work, he said, I have money momma. I can use my money from my piggy bank. My heart burst with joy. My boy was willing to forego his own cash for another. A part of me almost said don't worry momma can handle it but I thought no this is a learning opportunity. My curtailed response was that I thought that was a good idea and perhaps we could share the cost of the toy. Fine by him.

We went to the mall and they choose their toys. Monkey boy picked out a miniature transport truck packaged with other cars and my bug chose a playmobil horse with rider. We could have put the items in the toy mountain right at the mall but the kids wanted to give the firefighters the toys during Ottawa's Santa Claus Toy Parade this weekend.

Parenting does have some good moments. It looks like our countdown to Christmas is starting off with a bang.

Advent Calendars 2009

2009-12-01T20:34:00.000-08:00

Last year Karen introduced me to an idea for a new family tradition originating from Andrea at A peek inside the fishbowl. Last year I chose not to create an elaborate calendar but focused on finding a unique and/or necessary activity to celebrate the days leading up to Christmas. I had so much fun, see my posts with the tag 25 days to Christmas that I knew I had to delve into this activity again.

This year I decided to create a visual display of my activities by adopting the envelope idea. Initially I wanted to make my own envelopes but in reality I work 35 hours a week, take care of two kids, barely get supper on the table and tend to walk around on a sticky kitchen floor because I just don't have time to dig out the mop. So I compromised. I found some cute little cards at Michael's and decorated the accompanying envelopes. The result was pretty sweet as you can see if you check out Karen's blog. I originally hung the envelopes from our mantle but changed my mind once I found the stockings and realized they looked better on the mantle.

Our activity today was to decorate the house. The kids and I pilfered through the contents of a couple of Rubbermaid containers. We managed to decorate the house with the small collection of items I own. Through this process I've realized that I need to start collecting some quality Christmas decorations.

Watching my children discover items from Christmas past, I was reminded of how special my mom made our Christmases. I remember rifling through the Christmas tins and boxes filled with ornaments, linens and decor items. It always seemed like a mini-treasure chest that held delight, sparkly items and memories. Mom often had a story to tell about where an ornament came from along with a plate of cookies at the ready for us.

Mom not only created a vast world of memories I can draw from but she continues to make Christmas special. Among the few good Christmas items I have is a nativity scene. Mom gave my sis and I the main set and then added onto it for us. It is a nice treasure to share with my kids and forces me to remember the meaning behind Christmas.

Keep posted for more Advent Calendar updates. Hopefully I can find time to post before midnight on a work night (then maybe I could add some pics as well)

What's Up?!

2009-11-07T18:54:00.000-08:00

I've been laying low lately. I have lots of reasonable excuses for not posting, check them out:
*managed to have a two week cold at the end of September; my throat was so bloody sore and the hacking cough was annoying (to say the least)
*my uncle passed away; cancer...nasty disease; went home to Alberta for the funeral; sad days (though always nice to be with family...missing my sis and her kids big time)
*thanksgiving feast done solo (missed having my mom or mom-in-law to "help" prepare the meal)

*work was crazy busy, learning a new job and yet not feeling it is yours because other people are currently doing the work is truly overrated (but it is improving as the contract person has left now)
*working 5 days a week versus 4 is a huge adjustment especially combined with a lengthier compute when picking up the kids without a bike cuz the weather is too chilly
*annual trip to Mackenzie King Estate in Gatineau for fall colours

*annual pumpkin patch outing to Miller's Farm & Market (included a fresh batch of apple cider)

*a walk around a bog at Mer Bleue

*spending an evening with friends...a certain delightful layer of chaos (courtesy of four children all 5 and under) mixed with good food and conversation
*Halloween (definitely a favourite holiday for me...especially jack o'lantern carving; we carved 5 this year)

*my lil bug's birthday (see future post for more details)

You Capture : Happiness

2009-09-24T18:38:00.000-07:00

This week's You Capture photo challenge was happiness.

Happiness is universal and yet personal. My son came home with a project from school today. It was a piece of paper with a star at the top and a "poem" underneath it. The star had the phrase "I Wish" written on it. The poem read

Star Light, Star Bright
I Wish I May
I Wish I Might
Have the Wish
I wish tonight

Many of us have looked upon the vast night sky and recited this phrase, sending up a wish to the universe. My son's wish was "I wish I had presents all the time". A purely materialistic wish but it clearly spells out when he feels happiness.

For myself, my star wishes are simply for the feeling of happiness (honest). I experience happiness when I look upon the smiles (impish or pure) of my family. I'm filled with happy contentment when my husband's arms are wrapped around me. I delight in watching people letting loose and being a little silly. I'm giddy when delving into chocolate...cake, cookies, bars, beverages (you get the idea). I feel happy when I am close to nature.

This week I captured the smiles of my family.

But today on my bike ride to work, I felt happy. The air was crisp and smelled of fall. The trees are starting to display their glorious fall colours. The sun shone upon the earth making the dew twinkle and my heart rejoice. This picture captures the morning for me. My bike and nature.

Camera Play

2009-09-17T19:43:00.000-07:00

SORRY if I sent you on a wild goose to find this week's Happiness photos, please go here

I want to take my photography one step further. My goal is to truly understand and utilize apertures, shutter speeds, ISO, etc. Thankfully I have a very adept husband who is willing to share his passion (and camera lenses) with me.

My desire to make some changes in my photography have been further peaked from all the information I find on different blogs. I specifically like some of the challenges out there. So I've decided to take the plunge and I will be attempting to keep up with the weekly challenges from

This week's challenge: Macro. Get up close to the object.

This is a close up of a spider web attached to our peony and lily plants in the front yard. I tweaked the pic in lightroom with a preset titled Velvia and played around with the brightness. I love playing with effects. Lightroom along with photoshop are becoming my new favourite tools. Hope you like my macro picture. I do.

Late summer memory

2009-09-15T19:57:00.000-07:00

The weather this summer has been downright crappy. More rain in July than normal and cooler temperatures for August except for one horrendous week that forced everyone into air conditioned buildings. September is upon us already and with the last rays of sunshine basking our land we embarked on a trip to a beach on Saturday afternoon. We piled the kids into the car and drove a mere 30 minutes to Rideau River Provincial Park. We dragged our friends into the adventure and found that we practically had the beach to ourselves. It was warm but not overly. The water was still and inviting. The kids and J plunged themselves into the water. They floated, swam, played, chased gulls, and tried catching minnows in the shallow waters. An elaborate moat system was created on the beach and overflowed from the buckets of water. We capped the afternoon off with a picnic supper. It truly was a wonderful homage to summer.

New job - 1st day

2009-09-14T19:18:00.000-07:00

Spent most of the day orientating myself. First there was a session with human resources where I signed my name on the dotted line too many times to count. Next I meandered into the library and what may be the locale for the next chunk of my working life. I'm not sure what to make of my decision now that I have taken the plunge. I was so excited to remove myself from an insane situation and take on a new challenge that I forgot how taxing it is to try to absorb new material and figure out your place in a new place. I met with my new boss, received a brief run-down of library, took a library tour, and spent time with another person getting an overview of one aspect of position. Then the day was done. It was weird not actually doing specific work. I felt a bit out of my element.

It was also odd to be constantly introduced to people as Pam, the new reference services administrator, she use to work in interlibrary loans, do you remember her (egad that was 10 years ago and at the time I holed up in the ILL office). Makes you wonder if they were trying to justify my hire and make me an instant part of the climate. I think that may have been part of the case since there are two contract people on staff who applied for my new job, currently work in my new job but didn't get it. The reason is that they do not possess the Lib tech diploma, while I do. Talk about a potentially awkward situation, especially since I will be trained by one of them. Oh well, one day done and a few hundred more to go before I can retire.

I think the stress of the day was compounded by my lil bug having a nasty cold and fever. It was hard to leave her all day and not be there to comfort her. Thanks to J, she was in good hands though and managed to have a 4 hour nap...yep she must be sick cuz this girl does not normally nap. Ah, the joys of parenting while working. Not always the most ideal but a decision I have made for my sanity.

New job

2009-08-31T19:35:00.000-07:00

Attention, I would like to have your attention. You are now reading the blog of a Reference Services Administrator at a university library. I am no longer a federal government employee reduced to losing her job for a business model of shared services. I no longer need to worry about becoming bilingual. I am no longer stuck in a job with no room for upward mobility.

I'm a little anxious about adapting to a busy work schedule versus a laid back one. I'm quite worried that I may become overwhelmed with juggling work and home. But really I'm just plain EXCITED. I'm moving up in the world. I'm going to be in a interesting position dealing with reference staff and a learning disability centre. My salary has increased and the benefits are decent. Okay, maybe not as sweet as the government but hey I reaped those rewards already.

Wish me luck! I start on Sept 14th.

Time

2009-08-29T19:57:00.000-07:00

I've been desperately seeking out time. Time for household chores, time for me, time for the kids, time for hubby, time for friends, time for projects, time to breathe. Returning to work has been good for me. I thrive on routine. Work forces me to better manage my time. Yet I begrudge how little time is left for moments of pleasure.

I've had some good times:
*family trips to museums: Pinhey's Point Historic Site, Canada Science and Technology Museum, Canada Aviation Museum, Cumberland Heritage Village Museum (for Classic Car Show)
*strawberry picking on July 1st in the Ottawa Valley countryside
*weekend at a real Ontario cottage with some dear and amazing friends, which included a visit to Santa's Village, ice cream, Gaymer cider, wine, and two nights of playing Carcassonne
*brunch at the Chateau Laurier with 3 fun friends
*beach moments: Lac Philippe, Mooney's Bay, Britannia Beach (all within easy driving distance)
*day at Saunder's Farm
*morning bike rides to work
*Friday's off from work and parenting
*movie at a theatre with a friend to see the latest Harry Potter

I've had bad times:
*work as I know it is to come to an end due to a shift to a new "business model" of "partnerships"
*mounting sleep-deficit (mostly due to a young lady who is possessed and requires momma)
*feeling depressed, overwhelmed, angry or something or other and having hard time handling this emotion

I will continue to hunt for the elusive element of time and remember to enjoy the moments of fun.

Suburbia

2009-07-09T08:23:00.001-07:00

I often think I want to live in a hip urban neighbourhood. It would be great to walk out your front door and mosey on down to the local bakery, farmer’s market, coffee shop and quaint stores. Perhaps we could live more environmentally such as both of us cycling to work, walking to nearby parks or simply just reducing the size of our footprint. However, an urban neighbourhood in Ottawa is out of our price range.

We live in a old suburb. Our house was built in 1966. It is in dire need of some updates. The street is busier than we would like but we remain within the green belt. We have a kick ass sized lot with old trees. There is a mix of ages and a small mix of ethnic groups in the neighbourhood. The neighbours are super nice, friendly, observant and protective. We can let the kids play in the front drive-way (under parental observation of course) and enjoy waving and talking with people, their dogs and kids. I guess it isn’t so bad.

Owning a sizeable lot in the burbs means we must partake in some significant yard maintenance. Our front lawn consists mostly of weeds. There is clover, dandelions, crab grass, plantain, mallow, chickweed, wild strawberries, etc. J thinks it can be kind-of pretty as there are purple, white and yellow flowers. I, on the other hand, am slightly embarrassed by the composition of our lawn. Thankfully our surrounding neighbours seem to sport the same type of lawn. So I’ve come to embrace the nature of our lawn.

I am a vigilante when it comes to mowing the lawn. I LOVE a freshly mown lawn. It causes anxiety and frustration to see the lawn to grow for more than 7-10 days. I especially love hauling the gas powered lawn mower from our rotting shed (even with the knowledge that I will be polluting the environment). I delight in quickly starting the mower and hearing the engine roar into life. I revel in the idea of making a pattern in the front lawn. I tend to alternate between mowing the lawn vertically, horizontally and diagonally. This pattern change is a technique I learned from my dad.

My dad is a zealous lawn guru. He would not put up with the number of weeds I have. I’m sure he would be sporting his lawn weeder daily and would not hesitate to use chemical means to eliminate them. Nor would he baulk at the idea of re-sodding the lawn or at least adding topsoil and fresh grass seed to the lawn (a project that I am too lazy and cheap to undertake). I did learn from him to take great pleasure in mowing the lawn. I remember standing back with him and just enjoying the view of the lines cutting through the lawn. To this day, I admire my handiwork at mastering nature. The accomplishment and satisfaction of mowing a lawn pulses through me and I can’t help but feel a smile spread across my face and a desire to jump for joy.

My desire for a mown lawn must irk the neighbours. After I am done, the sense of obligation to keep up infuses the neigbourhood. It always makes me secretly giggle to see neighbours hauling out their mowers within a few hours or a day after I tackle my yard. It is funny to think that I am promoting a suburban ideal and forcing others to conform. Too bad they don’t seem to revel in the chore.

Possessed

2009-06-21T18:44:00.000-07:00

I swear that my 2 1/2 year old daughter is possessed at times. Generally, my lil bug is athletic, bright, funny and well-spoken though shy around adults. She has almost mastered using the toilet on her own. She loves horses and Thomas the train. She is a charming "big" girl who likes to give hugs and sweet kisses.
Unfortunately, the charm can be fleeting. She is a raving lunatic when she is tired, hungry or not getting her way. We try to insure the kid is well fed and rested. We even try to be one step ahead of her and offer her food, quiet times or distractions prior to the typical melt-down times. Yet what can you do when your stubborn, independent child REFUSES to sleep or eat or listen? What do you do when all rationale flies out the window and you are presented with a raging, indecisive, MAD child? Practical solutions, at best, are only temporarily accepted before being rejected with fierce unrelenting anger.

The best tantrums of late happen to arrive at the very start of a day. It is 6:30am or if we are lucky maybe the clock reads 6:50am. We are stirred awake by a wee voice calling out "I need momma". We both know that it is I who has to go into the room. If J even tries, our quiet home will be filled with piercing screams and cries intermingled with phrases that demand he goes away and that she needs momma. So I enter lil bug's room and am greeted with a request, I comply with a voice hushed and groggy with sleep. As I either gather up the desired blanket or move something else, anger enters her body. She no longer wants me to get her the blanket. She wants me to snuggle. No she doesn't want me to snuggle. I need to go away. No don't leave. Now I'm suppose to take all her blankets off the bed. But she is cold, put the blankets back on. She's hungry. She doesn't want to eat...and on it goes for at least 20-30 minutes. Needless to say I'm exhausted and my day has literally just begun.

I try to keep a lid on my temper. It is hard sometimes when a raving lunatic won't leave you alone or let you help her. There are times I wish I could take back the things I have said or quell the anger that shoots through my very being. I wish there was a sure fire way to work through her moments. I love the kid. I'm trying to raise her to be happy, conscientious of others, and capable of working through her frustration but some days I can't wait for my responsibility to end. I absolutely look forward to hearing her heavy snores echoing in the hallway outside her room. I dread our teenage years. I hope we survive.

Jet lag and good times

2009-06-08T17:57:00.000-07:00

The plane ride to Ottawa was great. The ride to the airport was tough. My lil bug cried, yelled and was hysterical for over 40 minutes. She demanded that we turn around NOW. She did not want to go to the airport. She wanted to stay with grammy. My mom finally managed to have her fall asleep in her arms while she paced outside the airport terminal in the arrivals drop off zone. I bet alot of people were hoping that the screaming child was not going to be on their flight. Well, no need to worry. She had a nap and life was rosy again. She finally picked up on monkey boy's excitement and loved the plane ride. The excitement even caused the two munchkins to stay awake the whole time (arriving at midnight or 10pm their time). Yet, they were perfect! They were ideal travellers! I'm not just tooting my own horn as I received multiple compliments from passengers and staff.

We arrived to a house in a state of disarray though relatively clean. J had slaved over the house, wiping down walls and counters, cleaning bathrooms, setting up bedrooms, etc. We had our floors refinished before the kids and I returned. It looks great though it created quite a dusty mess. The floors look so much better that we have voted not to return our hand-me down futons (which are now close to 20 years old) and IKEA chairs to the living room. They shall remain downstairs, amongst the boxes, piles of stuff and kid's toys. Now the task is to find replacement furniture. Our friends are placing bets on us. They think we will not have real furniture for 6 months. They recognize how slow we (i.e. J) can be in purchasing large ticket items. I desperately hope we can prove them wrong.

On top of the disarray caused by refinishing floors, we have also had to deal with a carpenter ant infestation and now mice. Frack! I hate pests!

BTW I've discovered that packing is fun compared to unpacking. I absolutely hate unpacking. What a huge annoying chore. An almost impossible chore to complete if you have two kids hanging around and demanding attention. Geez, can't they feed themselves :)

On a happy note, we've already reconnected with a couple of great friends. First, we were invited to monkey boy's gal pal's birthday party at a local hobby farm. It was a hoot. Monkey boy held hands and played with his friend the whole time. It was like they hadn't been apart for 9 months. Secondly, we had a picnic supper at our friend's house, Karen and John. The supper was great even though we had to transfer ourselves from a park to their house due to rain. Again monkey boy reconnected with his bud, E. They got along famously and the two little sister's enjoyed each other and tagged along after the older ones. It was such a pleasure for us to be in the company of friend's.

I will miss our families in Alberta, immensely. However it is nice to be home...even if there is more chaos than sanity.

FRACK!

2009-06-04T07:31:00.000-07:00

Westjet cancelled my flight this morning. I'm now stuck riding on a crowded airplane, leaving Calgary at 6pm arriving 11:48pm in Ottawa with two already overtired kids. What joy! What luck! I guess the stress of spending yesterday packing, finishing off some photo albums for the parents, sending letters and pictures to family and shipping 3 more boxes to Ottawa was misguided. At least I'm all set to go so today is a "free" day.

I think the zoo is calling our names...that should kill at least 3 hours of what is going to be a VERY long day.

Memory making

2009-05-30T20:45:00.001-07:00

The countdown to our return to Ottawa is in full swing. We celebrated monkey boy's 5th birthday, my dad's 65th birthday, and J's 39th birthday during the first half of this month. Yup, there are way too many Taurus males in my life.

The kids, my dad and I went to Day Out with Thomas : the Hero of the Rails Tour hosted at Heritage Park. This event was a HUGE hit, we rode the train, merry go round, had faces painted, etc. My daughter now insists her name is either Thomas or horsey everyday and cries whenever I tell her that her Thomas shirt is in the laundry.

We also squeezed in a trip to Head Smashed-In Buffalo Jump as well as Writing-on-Stone Provincial Park while visiting my in-laws mid month. The trips to these sites require posts of their own...someday.

J left on the 20th. He drove our RAV4 approximately 3500 "klicks" across the country. The RAV4 showed its true worth by capably hauling a crap load of books, files, toys, clothes, etc. Oh and I guess hats off to J for once again driving the highway routes from Calgary to Ottawa and then unloading our stuff into the house. No easy feat considering the vastness of northern Ontario and the load of boxes in the back of the vehicle.

J went home early in order to attend a conference. Once again I was a conference widow but this time I was living with my parents. Amazing how two extra adults, one who is officially the energizer super-grammy, makes handling two kids immensely easier. I'm going to miss the help...big time.

From the moment J left, I've been cramming the days with activity. We've been to Heritage Park and Banff. We've walked some trails in Nose Hill Park. We've checked out the community centre's splash park and huge sandbox. The kids had their hair cut. We walked and rolled over to the local Mac's convenience store to indulge in one of our last Alberta made slurpees (or as Mac's calls them, frosters). I've even squeezed in some shopping on my own for clothes for my upcoming return to work. I saw my son say good-bye to his preschool teachers and friends. I packed and shipped ten boxes of toys, clothes and other paraphernalia. I'm starting to wonder if the packing will ever end...probably not until I reach Ottawa and have the joy of unpacking all our stuff combined with cleaning and purging our house of outdated toys and clothes. Egad perhaps I should just stay in Calgary...Nay!

We have been biking and scootering around the ponds in my parent's neighbourhood. Lil bug is a great tricycle rider but her focus needs some work. My girl is so easily distracted and loves to gawk. It can be pure agony making it to the corner of the street. I'm not sure what is so fascinating about riding with one foot or watching the ground move beneath your bike. Where lil bug lacks in speed, her brother more than sufficiently covers the gap. He just flies on the scooter. He loves his mobility so much that he managed to wear out the scooter his grammy had at her house for the kids to use. The brake and handle broke right off.

Now I sit in the comfort of my in-laws office space after a fun afternoon in their company. I'm always amazed at how much we can cram into a mere day when children are part of the picture. For instance, today we started the gong show at 7am (after a restless night for lil bug and ME). We left Calgary at 9:10am to go to Claresholm (this is all after packing, eating, dressing and having the kids entertained by grammy). By 10:30am, we decided to make a pit stop in Nanton. We stopped to view the air museum, the model car show and vintage car show. Finally we made it to Claresholm by 11:55am. Ate lunch. The kids then proceeded to play in the sprinkler, wading pool, drink milkshakes, paint pictures, work with playdough, play horsey (yup, pillows can magically transform into bucking, galloping and show jumping horses), fight, have forced quiet time, wash dump trucks, watch computer videos with grandpa, make cinnamon buns with grandma, play, eat supper, put on a horsey show and have a bath. No wonder I am so flipping tired by the end of the day.

Yet, the day was great. The temperature reached a scorching 30 degrees celsius. Unlike Ottawa, the evening spells relief here in Alberta. A delightful cool breeze blows away the heat in order to leave a comfortable though sometimes chilly atmosphere to sleep in. In Alberta, you may wear shorts and a tank top during the day but you always have a hoodie and socks around for the evening.

I'm ready to return to Ottawa but I am sad to leave family and the breath-taking natural beauty in Alberta.

One step closer to Ottawa

2009-05-07T19:49:00.000-07:00

We've moved. We enjoyed our time at our Ranchlands townhouse rental. It was sad to leave the house with the beautiful view and easy access to our favourite haunts. It was also sad to see how much stuff we had accumulated since moving to Calgary. We arrived with approximately 10 boxes and 4 suitcases of household items. We left with significantly more despite donating 2 large bags of clothing.

The move to my parent's house went fairly well. We managed to move everything in 3 loads (1 in the back of my parents Chevy truck and 2 in our RAV4). We spent an excessive amount of time cleaning but at the end of the day we left the place better than we received it. My folks were great by not only helping us move items but taking care of the kids for a night and half day.

Currently we reside in my parent's basement. A pretty sweet deal considering they just moved into a gorgeous brand new bungalow, they are not charging us rent or utilities, they provide child care, cook some of the meals and have cable (woohoo). Yes, Jim and I have to sleep in the common area but that is only because our two munchkins cannot sleep in the same room. Monkey boy is a light sleeper and lil bug snores and wakes frequently with crys and nightmares. I am sure we will have some "testy" days, as my mom would say, since my dad and I tend to butt heads and everyone is use to doing their own thing. However it is a nice way to end our sabbatical in Alberta. The kids love their grandparents and we will know that they have a special bond with them when we leave.

As the last days in Alberta tick away, I still hope to visit the Royal Tyrell museum in Drumheller, Head Smashed-In Buffalo Jump in Southern Alberta (about a 45 min drive from the in-laws in Claresholm) and see those Rocky Moutains up close one last time.

If only we had smoked some dope

2009-05-07T19:17:00.000-07:00

My husband is a wise shopper. He spends countless hours researching the details on big ticket purchases. We talked, test drove and agonized over a car for at least 5-7 months. It took well over a year for him to buy his latest camera. Yet when a sale sign is displayed in a store his meticulous shopping sense can go out the window. He has been very successful at times with his sale obsession. I will give him credit for those trendy $8 jeans he found. However some of his bulk sized purchases of food have been wasted on us.

Now if you keep in mind his weakness for sale items, it is no surprise that a contest may pique his interest. Last month, he responded to a U of C alumni contest and won tickets for a dance production at the University of Calgary theatre. On the surface it sounded like a great opportunity. Unfortunately, I, his grumpy wife who does not handle surprises well, was not so thrilled by the "win" as it meant going to the show that night. Well, J convinced me it was a good idea by rounding up my mom to babysit and bribing me with a promise of dessert.

We barely made it there in time but we managed to sneak in during a brief pause in the dance production. The avant garde multi-media performance featured a dancer, artwork, a clarinetist and film-making. Icarus Fried was ... bizaare. We sat through the whole production. We sort-of liked aspects of it. We admired the talent of the performers. Yet we left shaking our heads, saying "what the hell?" and feeling that sometimes avant garde goes too far. We agreed that the performance would have made more sense "if only we had smoked some dope."

In the future, I am sure J will be a little more selective when entering contests. Yet we will always have this event to make us chuckle. We had a nice time together even if I never received my promised dessert.

Wow...

2009-04-28T19:03:00.000-07:00

Music captures and captivates. Add a beautiful stop motion video to the song and I'm wrapped into a dream blanket of peace and awe.

TV star sighting made at Aggie Days

2009-04-17T07:22:00.000-07:00

The Calgary Stampede sponsored Aggie Days at the beginning of the month. We took the C-train down to the Stampede grounds. A ride which thrilled the wee people to no end. We met J's folks to take in the event. The kids experienced a Stampede-style pancake breakfast, watched farriers compete to shoe horses, saw some animals up close and sat on small tractors. Lil bug delighted in watching the 4-H rabbits hop through an obstacle course. Monkey boy was out of sorts so he mostly moped and meandered through the event. In hindsight, it was not the best family event for us. It was unbelievable crowded. Our viewing of the animals came at the cost of pushing our way through throngs of people and their strollers.

We finally ended our visit in the Rural Routes and Acreage Lifestyle exhibition. This section of the event featured exhibitors selling farm equipment, decor and goods as well as highlighted tourist regions surrounding Calgary. The kids found themselves running from tractor to tractor to try them out. Grandma had a blast taking pictures of them.

The highlight for J and I was getting a glimpse of our favourite TV star...Terry Grant. Yep, you read that correctly, the one and only Terry Grant who is the star of Mantracker was at the High River exhibit. Very cool. J took a picture but neither of us felt like showing our crazed fan behaviour so we bypassed the line to receive a signed autograph. Hmmm, perhaps I will regret that move. At least we have pictorial evidence.

Television

2009-03-30T14:08:00.000-07:00

The television and I have a bit of a love affair. I truly bask in the brain-numbing glow that emits from the boob tube. I often find my thumb rapidly pulsing on the remote as I desperately seek out enertainment. I know that my mental and physical well-being would be better served if I sought out exercise, activity, hobbies or reading. Yet I'm drawn to the pleasure that courses through my body when I switch on the television and switch off my tendency to control and be ultra responsible mom and housekeeper.

Ironically, I still only have access to peasant vision. My dh and I have consciously chosen to use rabbit ears. I righteously proclaim to telemarketers that we do not subscribe to their competitors cable package nor do we intend to acquire satellite access to x number of channels. One would think that this take on television would translate into a conscious desire to eliminate television from our lives. No siree bob, that is not the case in my world. My evenings, especially during the winter months, are consumed by televsion viewing. I am a sucker for new programs, reality shows, documentaries, etc, etc.

I generally do not have a discriminating tastes when it comes to my program choices though I do have my favourites. Some current favourites are Lost and House . I also enjoy watching Mantracker, Survivorman, Amazing Race, Kenny and Spenny and America's Next Top Model with J. I often tune into Mentalist, Hell's Kitchen, Medium, The Office, Castle, CSI and Law and Order (though the formula used by these last two series is starting to render the programs boring). I'm sure I would enjoy delving into Heroes again but our rabbit years have caused such fuzzy reception at the beginning of this season that I am so lost regarding the characters and plot. To my credit (I hope) I am not a talk show or soap opera lover. Occassionally I have gone through periods of tuning into Coronation Street but honestly that is the extent of my foray into that genre.

Unfortunately, not all of my favourites are available on peasant vision. So how do I hear about these different programs? Either dear friends point me in the direction, lend me their copies or J comes across a review in his never-ending internet surfing. When I discover a series that is intriguing, I become a slave to the series. I patrol Rogers and Blockbuster Video weekly or biweekly in my insane desire to get my hands on the next episodes. A couple of favourites over the years have been Six Feet Deep, Carnivale, Deadwood and Big Love.

My ultimate favourite tv series has to be Battlestar Galactica. After reading a girlfriend of mine's blog, Virtually There, and her entry regarding watching the final episode of Battlestar Galactica, I again find myself wanting to rush to every nearby video store to get my hands on season 4.5. I finally finished season 4.0 but had to wait an infinitely long time for season 4.5 to become available. So far the blasted store near me hasn't had a copy on the shelf. Until I can get the dvd into my clutches, I will have to continue satisfying my insatiable entertainment needs with our peasant vision selection. As well as take quizzes like the one below:

Which Battlestar Galactica Character Are You?

More on Battlestar Galactica. Created by BuddyTV

March break

2009-03-29T18:01:00.000-07:00

The kids and I invaded my sister's house for 4 1/2 days. My sis lives in Red Deer, a small city located more or less right in between Edmonton and Calgary. Besides taking advantage of the March break to spend time with my sister and her family, we also managed to see more of J. My hubby is madly trying to spend his research funds before March 31st. This has meant he has been on a series of research trips and conferences in the last couple of months. He spent 11 days out of the country in February. He was in Winnipeg for 4 days. His final trip was to be spent in Edmonton for a week. Both he and I were feeling the effects of his being away. Therefore we arranged to plunk ourselves in Red Deer so J could research in Edmonton and then travel 90+ minutes to spend the night with us. It worked out well on so many levels.

My kids had a fantastic time with their cousins. They all played well together. We entertained ourselves with crafts, colouring, a trip to the nearby park and a visit to the swimming pool (equipped with a lazy river, wave pool, fountain pool, large water slide, and kids water park/pool).

As my parents grew up on farms just east of the city of Red Deer, there happens to be some family in the city. This trip I made some time to visit my grandma W. My granddad passed away almost 2 years ago and it was good to touch base with her again.

My sis, J and I took all of our kids to visit our favourite aunt and uncle on Friday. My uncle has recently been diagnosed with non-small cell cancer. It was important for me to see him and to let him and my aunt know that we are thinking of them. They have given us so many treasured memories and have always been at the periphery of our lives. It is hard to see them struggling with a life threatening illness but they are fighters and will hopefully see this disease in remission soon.

Finally monkey boy, lil bug and I went on a day adventure to the Reynolds-Alberta Museum in Wetaskiwin ( a mere hour north of Red Deer). The museum was terrific. The little bit I read on the story boards was both informative and interesting. The museum was filled with restored vehicles. There were cars, trucks, and farm equipment. We also caught the tail end of the Model T exhibit celebrating the 100th anniversary of the Ford car. We ended our tour with lunch at the museum cafe (which was quite good compared to some museum food I've had). Before we left, we popped over to the Aviation Hall of Fame museum and looked at the airplanes on display there. If I had more time and no kids tagging along, it would have been interesting to read about some of the aviators inducted into the hall.

The kids loved the museum. This was probably due to two factors. One, they both love vehicles, and I mean LOVE vehicles. Monkey boy has been playing with cars since he was a toddler and lil bug's favourite shirt is a hand-me down featuring a dune buggy. Secondly they both had a hoot taking pictures. Lil bug was using monkey boy's v-tech camera. Monkey boy had his hands on my Canon point and click while I was hauling around J's old Canon 20D. It was so much fun watching them take pictures and experience the museum in a more hands on way. I think we may have some photographers in the making, which would please both J and I as well as J's parents (photographers themselves). Photography may be an excellent way for our family to explore our surroundings and feel connected especially as the kids move towards their tween and teen years.

Saturday family outing

2009-03-15T09:13:00.000-07:00

Weather, bad moods and quick changes to plans thwarted a potentially good family day.

J and I planned to take the kids to Banff to ride the gondola up Sulfur mountain. We woke up to a day of sunshine and blue skies but we could see clouds shrouding the mountains from our balcony. J jumped onto the internet to see the current view from on top of Sulfur mountain via the web cam and indeed it was a cloudy grey day in Banff. However, the weather forecast indicated it would be clearing later. We decided to plunge ahead with our plan since we wanted to get out of the city. I madly ran around the house packing winter gear, rain gear, lunch plus the necessary entertainment for the car ride, DVD player, movies, leapster and Nev's camera.

When we told the kids our plans, the idea was met with trepidation. Lil bug's response was "I don't like the mountains." Monkey boy balked at the idea with some hums and haws. We ignored lil bug's commentary as she dislikes everything these days and always wants the status quo of play or activity to remain unchanged. We convinced monkey boy that it would be fun and he managed to muster some enthusiasm.

The ride was nice, despite the occassional complaint from the backseat. The view was lovely though the clouds seem to be settling into the mountains rather than dispersing. Ten minutes outside of the Banff National Park gates, J inquired what we should do since spending money to travel up a gondola to see clouds was not desirable. He asked if I brought swimsuits. Monkey boy perked up hearing this comment and thought it would be a great idea to go swimming in the hot springs again. Well, my disappointment over the weather forcing plans to change and the guilt over not remembering to pack the swimsuits, just in case, resulted in a lovely rant and my silly resolve that we should just go home.

We turned around at the gates but stopped in Canmore for lunch as our tummies were a rumblin'. The tourist information centre only had outside picnic tables. An option that was not all that appealing since it was breezy, chilly and starting to snow. The staff fortunately were able to recommend a place to eat a packed lunch and pointed us towards some casual activities to do with kids in Canmore. We made our way to the Canmore Nordic Centre, ate lunch and enjoyed watching the cross country skiers out the windows. We all perked up after filling our stomachs. Our family day looked like it might be salvaged.

J and I decided to take the kids for a short walk to see the hidden falls. Once again our idea was greeted with dismay. We forged ahead and endured a brief walk along a snow and ice packed path. Neither child liked the short trip up to the benches and viewpoint. We listened to a litany of it is too cold, too icy, I'm falling, carry me, etc, etc. We reached our destination in 15 minutes. Although the shade of a hill made it difficult to see, the falls were nice and covered with lots of ice. The kids finally snapped out of their moods and enjoyed themselves, climbing on the benches, throwing snow and looking at the view of the falls and the town of Canmore.

Upon returning to our vehicle, we headed towards a coffee shop for some sustenance and a caffeine induction for the adults. It was a little dicey again at the shop as lil bug was not satisfied with sharing the large apple juice with her brother. We finished our snack and piled into the car to return home. By this time, the sun was bathing Canmore in a wonderful warm light and the clouds were steadily disappearing. The weather improved but a little too late for us.

Lil bug fell asleep in the car and monkey boy relaxed in his seat occasionally taking pictures of the view out our window or playing his leapster. It was not an ideal outing but we muddled through and accomplished the goal of spending time together as a family. Next time, I will take the swimsuits (can never pack too much) or we will read the signs (bad weather and lack of enthusiasm from kids) a little more closely and alter plans before we leave the city. Why does knowledge often come with experience and hindsight? Where is that crystal ball I ordered?

Mother Bear

2009-03-12T20:23:00.000-07:00

Can 4 and 5 year old children be bullies? My answer is a resounding yes.

Monkey boy has been taking gymnastics since January. Despite his physical awkwardness and lack of strength, he tries everything. He listens to his coach (who unfortunately seems to lack the natural ability to guide or instruct, an apparent flaw that is seen by other parents). He has fun and his abilities are improving. In his attempts to execute a move, he usually succeeds or fumbles through but occasionally a mishap arises. To date he has hurt himself on the apparatus four times. As a sensitive, pleasing and slightly overwhelmed kid, he has reacted with tears and loud cries. In all cases, we have dealt with the hurt and re-joined the class. I've been proud of him and glad for the opportunity to teach him not to give up.

Today, my parenting philosophy towards monkey boy was challenged by two four year old boys. As we entered the gymnasium, one boy loudly called out "there is the baby boy" and another boy takes up the taunt and teasing attitude by also saying "he's the baby boy." My son was walking ahead of me and stopped. I was unable see his reaction or determine if he realized these words were being directed towards him. Yet I knew exactly what these little boys were saying. I was livid. Their parents did not speak out or correct these boys but rather just looked in our direction. The mother bear in me was incensed. I quickly and loudly blurted out to my son that those boys were being rude. This stopped the two boys and I think caught the attention of one parent, a dad. I directed my kid towards the boot removal area and clearly said to him not to listen to those boys but to go have fun and sit with some of the girls.

My son did not seem to question me or to display any hurt feelings. I decided not to pursue the issue. This was our second last class and I did not have the energy or resources to confront the parents and question their parenting style. I'm guessing they tell their boys not to be cry babies as where else would these young children develop a negative attitude towards tears resulting from pain. If this situation presents itself again, I will delve further into the issue especially if my son has to co-exist with mean children for any length of time. It is not acceptable to name call. Parents and children need to know this fact and check the tendency if we want to reduce bullying. I want to teach my children to not bully. I also want them to learn that it is just as harmful to join in the action by either copying the bullies or letting the bullies get away with their hurtful actions.

I know this is just the start of our many years in dealing with difficult situations. I hope that J and I have the ability to recognize problems quickly. I hope we find ways to teach our children to cope with the harshness of a tough, competitive and materialistic society and still be compassionate and caring individuals.

Canmore and friends

2009-02-27T23:16:00.000-08:00

How can a mere 24 hours be so remarkable and rejuvenating? Well, take some very dear friends I met during my two years at Augustana University College, add mountains (magic in itself) and toss in cross country skiing, good food and a whirlpool and presto you have created a recipe for a good time.

We converged at my place on Saturday and took two vehicles to Canmore, Alberta. The day was perfect. The weather was warm with clear, beautiful blue skies. In a mere hour we had exited the hustle and bustle of Calgary, traversed the foothills and were greeted by the mountains. We weaved our way through the town to Canmore Nordic Centre Provinical Park. After renting skis for me (this was the first time I have ever officially skiied in my life), we donned our gear and hit the trails. I did my best to keep up with the ladies. I was a sorry display of athleticism but there was no way you could remove the stupid smile on my face or the determination in my heart. I wiped out twice. Once out of stupidity. I wanted to turn around to take a picture of the landscape but neglected to remember I had trees tied to my feet. The second time I lost my balance heading down a hill trying to get my skis into the groomed tracks. At the end of a few fantastic hours in the mountain air exercising, we all left with a little bit of sun on our face, aches in our legs and shoulders and words still streaming from our mouths.

We rounded out the day with a dip in our hotel's hot whirlpool to ease the aches away. Then enjoyed a fantastic Spanish and Mexican food at Tapas restaurant and begoda. The meal was divine.

It has been a long time since I have spent time with these 3 great friends and we had a lot of catching up to do. It was interesting to hear about the paths everyone's life has taken. It was enlightening to find out what each person does to motivate themselves, cope with upheavals and participate in the world around them. I was inspired. I also felt such peace and contentment being present and in the moment with these friends.

Once again I am finding friendship the key to good living. I cherish these moments and hope to create more.

Calgary attractions

2009-02-27T22:47:00.000-08:00

Our time in Alberta is quickly approaching its end. Only 3 more months and so many "tourist" items left on my list. Thankfully February has provided enough days with decent weather that we have managed to squeeze in some Calgary attractions.

J and I took the kids to the zoo at the beginning of the month. We had a great time. The weather was perfect, the animals were alert, and the kids well-behaved. J managed to take some wonderful animal pictures while the kids and I delighted in watching

hippos sleep,
red pandas race around their enclosure,
giraffes saunter,
tigers roll on their backs or pace through their home,
rays skim through water,
and a baby gorilla play in the straw.

The zoo was a great way to spend time as a family. So great that we invested in a membership. All we have to do is attend at least 3 more times and we will have paid it off.

For Valentine's day we combined family time with visiting the Calgary Tower. After traveling downtown via the C-Train (which the kids still rave about to this day), my mom-in-law and I took the kids to the top of the tower while J and his dad went to some photo exhibits. It was a hoot watching the kids walk on the glass floor and observe the world in miniature below them. They thought it was neat "sitting" on the buildings and watching the cars and C-Train travel by. The glass floor initially freaked me out. It is amazing how your sense of sight strongly affects your body's reaction. I actually had the sensation of falling when I was stepping on the floor. We spent about an hour cruising through the Calgary Tower and enjoyed attempting to see the sights through the clouds and snow surrounding the tower. We capped our day off with lunch at a restaurant and then supper with my family (sis, her kids and my folks). Two free meals, a tourist attraction, and well-behaved kids created a special day to remember. Check out the train yard, Saddledome, and Stampede grounds as seen looking east and slightly south from the Calgary Tower.

Dublin

2009-02-27T21:57:00.000-08:00

Four days in Dublin meant
walking
eating
laughing
hanging in pubs
poking through shops
absorbing the charm of old buildings and bleak weather
being with dear friends

I have more words and commentary but I still feel unable to concisely capture my thoughts and experience. I cannot decide if I want to review my trip chronologically or in moments. Or if I want to reveal how it has opened my eyes regarding my likes and dislikes.

All I know is that it was a good trip. It was a necessary break from being a parent and partner. It made me a little more aware of myself. It enabled me to understand who I am as a traveler and what I like to do on a holiday. It reminded me that my friends accept me for who I am and I need not worry about being perfect. It also reinforced how important my friends are in my life. I need them and should always remember to have fun with them. The four friends I spent time with are charismatic, thoughtful, funny and frickin' gorgeous.

Dublin calling

2009-01-27T03:45:00.000-08:00

Although I've been plagued by mice and run into by cars, I've been able to keep smiling. Why? I'm going on a holiday. Four girlfriends and I are traveling to Dublin for 4 days. Why? Because we deserve it of course.

Also we are celebrating our collective birthdays. Four of us met at Algonquin College's Library and Information Technician program. We soon discovered a similarity. We were all close in age and had January and February birthdays. We have tried to get together to celebrate our birthdays over the years (I've known these friends for 13 years now). This year we are taking it one step further and traveling abroad. Dublin may seem like a strange choice for a winter get-away but it will suit all of our personalities.

So three cheers for holidays...hip, hip, hooray!

Mini-scare

2009-01-24T07:29:00.000-08:00

I'm not sure how I want to describe yesterday's events. Generally I'm not feeling shaken or scared but I am sort-of ill at ease with the situation. Right now I feel very removed from the incident. So this post might come off as cold, factual and objective.

I was rear-ended yesterday while stopped at a red light. Lil bug was in the back in her car seat and I was on my way to retrieve monkey boy from preschool. Lil bug and I are fine. Our lovely new RAV4 has bumper damage but it is completely drivable. My main concern was making sure someone was able to pick up monkey boy. I just didn't want him to be left waiting. The problem was that J had the cell phone. Thankfully the man who hit me let me use his phone. I called my folks at home and on their cell (my thought was they had a car and could get to monkey boy the fastest). Problem was there was no answer. I left a desperate message with them requesting they pick up monkey boy. I then called J. He was there and said he would handle things with monkey boy by calling the school and arranging a taxi ride over to the facility. Relief reigned supreme. It wasn't until later did I realize that I neglected to let my loved ones know I was okay and so was lil bug. I feel strange that I was more concerned about the child waiting for me and not the one who was in the accident with me. I guess because I knew she was okay and babbling about what happened I put my worries aside for her.

After exchanging information (while listening to my daughter hysterically cry because a strange man was in our car and I refused to let her out of her seat because we were still in traffice), we finally reached the police by phone. We found out that we needed to go to a police station to file a report as the police would not send out a car to an accident where the parties were not injured and the vehicles did not require towing. I insisted we go together to the station and file right away. Ironically enough the police station is a mere 5 minute walk from monkey boy's preschool. After putting the paper work into motion, I used the station's phone and reached my folks. They were on their way to meet J and monkey boy at the preschool with a car and car seat. I told them to drop by the station to see if I was still there before they left the area. As we wrapped things up with the police, my whole family arrived and my daughter declared "Daddy, I'm at a police station." Hmmm, not something I think either J or I hoped to ever hear from her especially when she is only 2 years old.

Well there is my tale.

Mouse saga

2009-01-24T07:25:00.000-08:00

We are still plagued with mice. We've caught two more since my last report and we think there may be more. They are pretty sneaky creatures. They can lick the peanut butter right off the trap without triggering it sometimes. Frustration reigns supreme and my kitchen floors and cupboards are littered with sealed food products, They think they are winning but we too can be persistent and patient.

Mouse taunts tenants part two

2009-01-22T21:16:00.000-08:00

The scoreboard reads:

Mice 4
Humans 1

Yes you read that correctly. It is no longer one mouse we are combating. We have been invaded by mice. My theory for this takeover is warm weather seduced the mice out of their houses, roofing work on our townhouse condo unit created an opportunity for the mice to explore homes, the cold weather and some shingles returned, and the mice were "trapped".

No sooner did the sweet kitchen mouse meet her demise when another one emerged from hiding. I'm referring to it as the living room mouse. When kitchen mouse was "caught", J kindly took care of the remains and inquired whether or not we needed to keep the trap. I dismissed his worry of another mouse and returned my attention to the boob tube. As he dressed to take the mouse remains to the garbage dump, I heard a scratching scamper coming from the play area. I turned my head, peered into the dark and spotted it. The living room mouse.

She is a crafty and bold one. She walked over to the table area to locate the crumbs on the floor by first traipsing through monkey boy's toy cars, then the fisher price farm set and under the little tikes semi-trucks. As long as there is no movement, she happily explores. When J and I approach, she scampers away in a flurry. We've set more traps but so far she evades them. I guess kitchen mouse wasn't as bright. She seemed to walk right into our trap a mere two minutes after it was set with peanut butter.

I hope we catch living room mouse tonight. I'm getting miffed, royally. I hate mouse turds and worrying about our food. I dislike the idea of scouring this house to rid it of mouse droppings.

I truly hope only two took up residence. I'm not sure if I could handle a full scale assault.

Mouse taunts tenants

2009-01-22T17:15:00.001-08:00

My girlie screams have finally stopped re-vibrating off the walls. The wee gray mouse that now resides in our house has successfully scored 3 points on this human. Our first encounter was last night during a commercial break for LOST. I shrieked and quickly place my feet on the couch while the mouse found a place behind the mass of wires near the computer. In hindsight, I'm sure I missed a few scurries across the floor due to being fully engrossed with the season premiere of my favourite mainstream TV series.

Our second encounter almost lead to the demise of the mouse. I had her cornered in the lazy susan cupboard at 8:15am. I discovered the mouse after opening the bottom cupboard to locate monkey boy's oatmeal and there she was in all her sweet tiny gray glory. I started pulling out cereal boxes and baking supplies with the long handled BBQ flipper. For the record I really don't think I am scared of a mouse. I'm just a little FREAKED about touching mouse turd or having a mouse travel across my arm to a new location. I swear "freaked" is absolutely different than "scared." Anyway, I digress.

I had removed almost all items from the cupboard placing them a safe distance away to clean later. It was at this time monkey boy and lil bug thought they should inquire as to what happened to their breakfast. I turned my hibby jibby feelings off and excitedly showed them the mouse. The mouse scurried about the top shelf unphased by the rapt attention she was receiving. I put monkey boy in charge of watching the mouse while I armed myself with a tupperware container (aka the trap) and the metal BBQ flipper. I sent the wee people out of the kitchen to find my spouse (who lay dozing in bed) as I knew help may be required and I didn't want them to see me battling a mouse.

The mouse made an offensive move and jumped to under the lazy susan making simple capture remote. I quickly responded by kneeling and prodding underneath with the flipper. My plan of attack was to corner her and urge her into the container. My crafty foe evaded my moves. She even taunted me by calming scratching herself while I waggled my rump in the air. I was enraged. I thrusted the flipper in an attempt to urge her to one side. She scampered right past me. The fastest piece of gray literally flew in a race around the edge of the kitchen. My plan was foiled. My spouse and kids arrived to see me scrambling on all fours searching for my adversary.

I decided that the humane way was not going to work. I was ill-equipped and pissed about all the mouse droppings littering the inside of my cupboard. I hatched a new plan...traps. After a trip to Rona for supplies, the mouse provided the proverbial final straw that broke the camel's back. She brazenly scurried past me when I opened the garbage and cleaner cupboard causing me to pierce the air again with girlie shrieks. Little does she know that there will be two traps enticing her into a way out of our house.

I feel a tad guilty about having to kill her. We reside near a field which is probably her home. I'm sure our house merely looked like it had a nice cozy welcome sign. In the midst of winter, who wouldn't want to reside in a warm house with a free buffet. Unfortunately my guilt is not overriding my desire to rid the house of the mouse. I just hope we can quickly catch her and dispose of her before the wee people want a in depth look and explanation.

Elbow Falls

2009-01-18T06:53:00.000-08:00

Kananaskis Country beckoned us into its midst with the promise of beautiful views, fresh air and sunshine. We took a short drive from the city into the wilderness of the foothills. Our destination was Elbow Falls. The roads were quiet and clear until we arrived at the falls. Lining the road before the closed park gates were cars filled with backcountry hikers and snowshoers. I guess we weren't the only ones hearing the call of good weather and the countryside.

The parking lot for the falls was deserted. We donned some warm clothes (the wind was still chilly) and ventured onto the hard-packed trail. We quickly found ourselves at a viewing point (not much of a hiking trail) but the river was lovely. We wandered at a snail's pace to the last viewing point and discovered the following scene.

The picture doesn't quite capture the reality of the moment but add extra blue to the sky, the sound of a river rushing over rocks, crisp air and warm sunshine and you can get a pretty good idea of the peace we felt at being near nature. We took our time at Elbow Falls to allow the wee people to play in the snow (eating it and throwing some into the river). A few other people viewed the falls but none seemed to relish the moment as much as us (perhaps the guy wearing shorts and sandals didn't realize it wasn't even spring yet).

The day was capped off with lunch in the hamlet of Bragg Creek. The kids behaved themselves very well (even if lil bug thought she might have a starvation meltdown when we first arrived until I pulled out snacks to tide her over until lunch was served). We took a few minutes to wander around the local shops and hopped into the car to return to the city.

Getting out of the city was a much needed break from the everyday. Three cheers to sunny days and local attractions.

Sunny Alberta

2009-01-16T14:04:00.000-08:00

Sunny days, sweepin' the clouds away, on my way to where the air is sweet ...

Ahh, that lovely Sesame Street theme song is spinning around in my head as I sit here bathed in glorious warm sunshine pouring through our west facing balcony doors. Unlike the rest of the country, Alberta is experiencing a reprieve from the chill and snow of winter. Our current temperature is a balmy 7ºC, tomorrow's forecast high is 10ºC and (hold onto your hats) Sunday's temperature is suppose to reach 13ºC. Yep, this is one reason I love Alberta weather. Winter can be nice. Warm winter temperatures almost cancel out the effect of the ferocious winds. It is without a doubt that warmer temperatures seduce you into wanting to be outdoors trying different sports.

Coincidentally, monkey boy's preschool held its winter play day this morning. Teachers, students, parents and siblings delighted in sliding down hills, skating, and hot chocolate on this warm day. Unfortunately, monkey boy's cautious nature meant we risked collision with other tobogganers in order to let him sled from half way down the hill instead of the top. His hesitancy also meant that we quit a little earlier than the rest. Yet I found a positive in his unwillingness to participate in activities like the others kids. I re-discovered that he is perfectly capable of being independent. He has a remarkable ability to occupy himself. He and his sister entertained themselves with some spray bottles filled with coloured water. He did not hesitate to enjoy an ice rink just because he lacked skates or helmet (or because his folks refuse to purchase more winter paraphernalia that they would have to ship to Ottawa in June). Although I missed the opportunity to have more social contact with adults, I did enjoy spending the morning outside with my two favourite wee people. Plus I did manage to have some adult contact once we went inside for hot chocolate and goodies. I'm stepping outside of myself and just pursuing conversation whenever the opportunity arises. It is fun getting to know people and what they do.

My next project is to figure out how to enjoy the weather this weekend...trip to the mountains, road trip to a nearby attraction. Finally the opportunities seem endless instead of prohibited by bad roads and bad tempers.

Mood swings

2009-01-12T12:40:00.000-08:00

Birthdays seem to lay a mixed bag of emotions into my lap. I like celebrating other people's birthdays. I love celebrating monkey boy's and lil bug's birthdays. I am always pleased to have a birthday. Counting down my years in this life does not bother or perplex me. I am always flattered, thrilled and delighted to hear from family and friends.

I just always find myself a wee bit melancholy. Sometimes I chalk up my mood to winter weather or being far from family on my birthday but I don't think that is all of it. This year I find myself basking in sunshine and warmer temperatures along with the company of family nearby and yet I feel grumpy, irritable, and sad. Perhaps I allow myself too much time to reminisce and over-analyze my current state of affairs.

Don't get me wrong, I have a good life. I love my spouse, children, family and friends. My job (which is on hold for me until my return from this sabbatical) may not always be fulfilling but it satisfies my need to work and bring in some money. Yet I fret and think I desire other things (unnamed and unknown).

Thankfully I know this funk will eventually fade. Hopefully I will come to terms with some of my short-comings and build up some plans to inspire and motivate me. I usually do. I just hate meandering through the swamp of melancholy in order to find a sense of peace. I dislike how my mood effects others. Today, my birthday, I will remind myself to enjoy the sunshine rather than wallow in the muddy slush it creates.

Lost in space

2009-01-07T22:24:00.000-08:00

I'm here.

I exist.

I just lost my creativity somewhere. Sending out a search party right now. Will report in on results soon.

In meantime, here is a brief utilitarian update:

Christmas was great. Had fun with family. The kids were spoiled. Tired of driving Alberta highways in the winter.

New Year's was quiet. J and I played on the computer (our separate computers). Managed to steal a new year's kiss though. Main goal for 2009 is to make time for myself and time for J a priority.

I love returning to the routine of life, i.e. preschool, errands, groceries, library visits, gymnastics for kids and occasional museum trips (Telus World of Science keeps the kids busy but it just does not live up to the expectations I have created based on frequenting museums in the Nation's Capital).

Excited about my trip to Ottawa Jan 26 to 28. And even more excited about my trip with some girlfriends to Dublin Jan 28 to Feb 2. Very, very excited.

The kids are both endearing and infuriating.

Experienced a stark realization, our time in Alberta is quickly vanishing. There are so many projects I want to work on and finish (knitting, photo albums, memory books), so many places I want to visit with the kids (Head Smashed in Buffalo Jump, Kananaskis country, Tyrell Museum in Drumheller, Fort Calgary, Reynolds Alberta Museum) and so many experiences I hope to fit in (cross country skiing, hiking near Canmore, horseback riding, etc).

Tis the season to be jolly

2008-12-24T19:47:00.000-08:00

Yep, I'm feeling pretty jolly right about now. This feeling has nothing to do with the mulled wine I consumed a few hours ago or the vast quantities of cookies I devoured. Honest! Rather I feel content knowing that we are spending time with family, enjoying the excitement of our children's anticipation of Christmas day and finally realizing that there is nothing left to do other than play Santa Claus.

I have tried to keep this holiday season fairly low key. I haven't spent hours in crowded malls, felt the pressure to create a perfectly decorated home, nor have I found myself staying up late to ice that last batch of mocha frosted drops. I did fail to find a pink horsey for my lil bug (mainly because I decided to pass on buying into the mass marketed my little pony or large stuffed unicorns). Hopefully the cute brown stuffed Ty Beanie baby horse along with a horse book will be a sufficient substitute.

Despite my attempts to be calm and relaxed I have had my testy moments with the kids and my spouse at times. I have lost my patience and have been pretty tough on my monkey boy. Hopefully he and I can weather through our battle of wills and continue to find special snuggle times to help us through his growth in independence and bossy tendencies.

I honestly tried to keep up my family advent calendar. The days however started to blend and like any good cookie were quickly consumed in a brief memorable moment of pleasure. The last days of our family advent calendar were filled with decorating sugar cookies, creating tree decorations, tobogganing down a small hill at the farm, having a bubble bath and making a play fort/castle/house using a table and old bedding.

Other than our trip to Heritage Park and our family snowball fight, the highlight event from the advent calendar was trimming the tree we had chopped down from a stretch of forest in the foothills west of my in-laws homestead. Thankfully our tree-hunting expedition took place in late November since the last few days have been bitterly cold (as in -25 degrees celsius with a windchill of -30 or so) and there is no way I wanted to be in isolated country hunting the roadside for a suitable specimen to drag home.

Today was fun. A chinook wind blew in stirring up the snow, causing blustery conditions on the roads but heralding warmer temperatures. We managed to go outside twice today. The second time provided an opportunity to ride my father-in-law's new snowmobile. It was so much fun!! I love speed! Monkey boy went on a quick run with J and lil bug ventured out with her grandpa (who can do no wrong).

We had a nice super of chicken wings, rice, broccoli, veggies and dip and sweets. The kids had a great time playing kitchen. My father-in-law drew a stove top onto a large box and my mother-in-law located a vast array of kid's cups, saucers, and other various kitchen paraphernalia for them to use. We ended the day with setting out a cup of water and orange for Santa as well as 8 slices of apple for the reindeer. The kids received matching monster truck pajamas from their grandparents and crawled into bed, excited but not overly bursting at the seams.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow. I've promised myself to relax and enjoy the moments. I also want to find more moments with my honey like this:

Hiatus from family fun

2008-12-14T17:05:00.000-08:00

I have laryngitis. It started Friday afternoon along with a monster headache and it has only been in the last few hours that I can talk above a whisper. It has been a challenge to reign myself in from commenting on my children's play, behaviour and squabbles. Perhaps it is a good lesson to use my words a little more wisely and efficiently (at least in the verbal realm, as we all know I can't stop my overzealous use of words in my writing).

Now laryngitis shouldn't have put a stop to my creating family memories in our lead up to Christmas but combined with -21 to -27 degree celsius weather, I decided to forego the outing to view the Christmas lights display on 14th Ave near Confederation Park. I also lost any desire to go on a shopping trip to purchase birdseed and then create a feeder with the kids. I really just did not have it in me to be any more ambitious than wasting some time at the nearby Chapters on Saturday or to venture outside and play for 10 minutes today.

I did manage to finish most of my Christmas cards. J put together a great picture collage of the kids combined with some witty text. I will hold off posting the card here as I am sending the card to the one or two readers that check out my blog (sometimes surprises can be nice).

I am almost done all my baking. Here is the current tally of yummy goodies sitting in my freezer ready to be doled out to family and friends:
-nuts and bolts
-mocha frosted cookies
-pecan balls (as this is a personal favourite of my mom and son, we are on batch #2)
-gingersnap cookies
-pinwheel cookies
-coffee cheesecake squares
-caramel squares

I still need to make some pistachio cocoa nib cookies and sugar cookies. I am stalling on making my famous (per my fellow co-workers opinion poll) sugar cookies (the secret is in the icing) until we go to my in-laws. My mom-in-law is the sugar cookie expert and loves to get the kids to help bake and decorate.

So hopefully this case of laryngitis is on the way out the door as the countdown to Christmas quickly evaporates into thin air. I'm just glad that the only shopping that I have left is for my husband...though this may prove to be the most difficult task I have left on my to do list.

Decorating

2008-12-13T07:12:00.000-08:00

On Day 11, lil bug was thankfully napping away her grumpiness, so monkey boy and I found some time to work with on a pre-packaged foamy project. Personally, I'm a pretty crafty kind of gal. Heck I made over 100 place settings of tiny flower pots filled with plaster in order to support a hand crafted wire spiral which in turn held a paper flower printed with a quote for our wedding day. A little over zealous on my part but my roomate at the time helped with finishing it as well as finding time to mock me in a good natured way.

However, I now have 2 kids under 5 years of age. I don't have the luxury or desire to develop my own craft idea, purchase the supplies, or be patient with setting it up. I have grown to like the instant kits, especially when they involve foamy pieces with adhesive already on the back. The downfall is sometimes they don't always stick but a little glue or willingness to try another one seems to solve that problem.

So monkey boy and I created some Christmas trees. He found it very amusing that we were making Christmas trees for the Christmas tree. I love the fact that he is starting to see the humour in life's little things.

Day 12 of our family advent calendar focused on decorating again. This time with lil bug. I have fortunately re-connected with a friend (my birthday twin) from my college days. She has two children as well and we are both recent Calgary inhabitants. We have been trying to get together with our youngest kids on a regular basis while the older ones are in school or pre-school. Yesterday she arranged for us to have the kids decorate gingerbread cookies. After lil bug overcame her shyness and indignation over going somewhere she thought she didn't want to go, we had a good time watching them paint their cookies and eat their way through candies. Lil bug's final assessment was "that wuz fun".

Family advent calendar: Day 8-10

2008-12-11T07:09:00.000-08:00

Day 8: activities scratched as no interest was shown for making cards or decorating an ornament

Day 9: Donated toy to Salvation Army toy drive; this was such a great opportunity to teach the importance of giving even if it is to "someone we don't know". Monkey boy picked out a John Deere excavator because he thought someone would like to play with it and because it wasn't too big or too small. I was so proud of him when he placed the toy into the donation box and truly listened to my words about donating.

Day 10: fell a bit off the advent bandwagon again; my in-laws were in town and my mom-in-law wanted help shopping for the kids. It was nice to spend time just with her and have the kids taken care of by J and my dad-in-law

Snow Day

2008-12-07T21:22:00.000-08:00

Day 7 of our countdown to Christmas found us having a family snowball fight (impromptu).

Big fluffy flakes floated down from the sky. It was a perfect day for snowballs.

My sister and her kids had decided to drive down to Calgary to spend the day (there was no snow in her part of the province, a mere 150+ km north). After lil bug's nap, we hustled over to the grandparent house and delved into a fantastic family snowball fight. The boys delighted in socking their parents and grandparents with snow. The girls attempted to hold their own though lil bug discovered that snowballs are good eating and proceeded to devour two or three while the snow flied around her.The adults found their inner child and enjoyed plowing each other with a barrage of snowballs. J thought it was a hoot to stuff snow down my pants as I took pictures. Someday I will pay him back.

Heritage Park

2008-12-07T20:58:00.000-08:00

Day 6 of our family advent calendar took us to Heritage Park and their seasonal event, Once upon a Christmas.

Perfect day, happy kids, happier parents, mild weather, fun activities, great escape.

There was:
model trains - have I mentioned that both my kids LOVE trains and they easily spent 30+ minutes watching them go around the tracks waiting for their favourites to reappear.

gingerbread people decorating - icing and sprinkles everywhere!

candy store - they each picked out a candy to try. Monkey boy wanted gummy bears, lil bug chose gum drops. The gum drops were quickly spit out by both parties but monkey loved the gummy bears.

straw fort - this was a little anti-climatic as there were probably only 15 bales placed in a loose rectangle shape but they loved to run atop them nonetheless.

Victorian decorated homes - one of the homes I use to work in as an exhibit interpreter was open. It didn't take long for me to lapse into my spiel on the place...egad how long will useless historical facts persist to take up space in my brain.

wagon rides - they were fun to watch and held the kids attention but we passed on taking one due to large crowds. Lil bug managed to pet one of the Belgians and loved it, of course.

We capped the morning off with lunch out at a coffee shop/cafe (similar to Bridgehead or Wild Oats in Ottawa but a little more commercial in feel). Finally we piled into our house and beds at 1:45pm and we all slept soundly to 3:30pm. I guess the fresh air, exercise and excitement wore us out.

It truly was a great morning!

Family advent calendar: Day 3-5

2008-12-05T22:43:00.000-08:00

Day 3: Letters to Santa.

It was a bit of a struggle to build my kid's enthusiasm for this activity. I definitely need to work on my advertising pitch and perfecting my timing of activities a bit more for my two munchkins. Nonetheless as a grumpy momma I plowed through with the idea, prompting them to provide me with the contents of the letter. Thankfully, they seemed to enjoy decorating the cards with stickers and foamy pieces.

The letters are as follows:

Hi Santa,
My name is *. I am 2 years old. I want a horsey for Christmas, a pink horsey.
Thank you,
*

Hi Santa,
My name is *. I am four. I'm going to be at Grandpa and Grandma's for Christmas. I'm going to leave a snack for your reindeer in the snow by the apple tree. Could you bring me a present for Christmas? I would like a Ming-Ming the Wonder Pet stuffed animal and a car that lights up but no sounds.
Have a good Christmas,
*

Day 4: Pick out Christmas books at the library for us to read.

As always the library continues to be a favourite outing for the kids. The Christmas selection of books at our library was significantly picked over. Everyone must have had the same idea as myself. The three bays of shelving held a scant 15 books. We came home with four and so far the favourite is Spot's Magical Christmas (not necessarily my first choice).

Day 5: Paint Christmas ornaments

I chose to dig out this activity to keep us busy during that restless witching hour before dinner arrives on the table. Thankfully J was home to help...he chose to make dinner (mainly so he wouldn't have to agonize over the mess the kids would undoubtedly create). The kids donned their smocks/aprons and plastered a couple of wooden ornaments with paints. My kids are free spirits when it comes to crafts. I have really tried not to put parameters on where or in what manner to paint, colour or draw. Yet tonight a little assistance was needed. I wiped off monkey boy's first attempt at painting the ornament when I realized he was just using it as a palette for mixing colours. We then worked together to sort-of paint in the lines. Lil bug patiently put up with my holding her hand to paint but was delighted when she could just freehand paint on paper and play in the water bowl. After a period of soaking the newspaper with water and getting paint up to their elbows, we put the paints away for another day. This was a great activity. Both the kids and I had fun just being creative and messy.

Gingerbread houses

2008-12-05T21:42:00.000-08:00

A friend of mine, Karen, pointed me in the direction of a delightful blog, A peek inside the fishbowl, by a fellow Ottawanian. I was inspired to organize my December calendar after reading her 25 days of Christmas challenge. My calendar is now officially loaded with a fun activity for each and everyday, though I have yet to create funky envelopes to hold the day's events. Thankfully I brought out my fabric advent calendar with the tiny pockets I like to fill with stickers, cars and odd ball dollar store items. Monkey boy and lil bug receive instant gratification with counting down the days on our advent calendar and I know that I have something extra up my sleeve for their day.

I started the countdown to Christmas off with a bang. Day 1 and 2 were occupied with creating a gingerbread house. As kids, my sister and I rarely received a gingerbread house kit. If memory serves me correctly, I think the few we tried were pretty awful looking or never structural sound. Yet I felt ambitious this year. I'm not working, I have a desire to create and bake, and I want to share special moments with my kids. So I figured how hard could it be to make a gingerbread house from scratch. I poked around the internet for directions, recipes and templates. I meshed some information together and decided to plow headfirst into the project. The kids helped me prepare the dough. It was a hoot to see them mixing the enormous pile of dough. Monkey boy's running commentary regarding texture and colour kept me entertained.

The only glitch was the dough was too dry. I knew I couldn't roll it out, there was absolutely no way it would stick together. I had this huge mound of dough (the recipe called for 9 cups of flour) and I wasn't about to start over again or let it go to waste. Crap what should I do? Well, call my mom of course. With rolling pin in hand (our rental place was devoid of one), my mom came over, suggested I try adding milk in small batches while she occupied the kids. It worked enough for me to roll out the dough on a cookie sheet and have it more or less stick together.

After the kids were in bed, I cut out the house shape and baked the dough. While assembling the two houses, I realized I probably should have copied a template off the internet rather than create my own. The pieces fit together fine for monkey boy's house. The problem rested in the aesthetics and the lack of dough for lil bug's house. Let's just say that it is a good thing I found a fantastic icing cement recipe which would hold the patchwork roof together on her house.

Upon waking the next day, monkey boy was itching to decorate his house especially after glimpsing the assembled product on the dining room table in the morning. By 9 am the kids and I were decorating the houses and working on a mini-sugar buzz for ourselves.

It was fun watching them decide how to decorate. Their stamina was limited as was my selection of candies. However for a 2 and 4.5 year old they did pretty good.

Cruising Highway 2

2008-11-28T07:58:00.000-08:00

I love cruise control! I like to set it at about 115/117 and motor down the highway with my ipod blaring tunes through our stereo. Okay, I really don't blare the tunes because I have two young kids in the backseat who seem to like to hear their dvd player or leapster game. Nonetheless, I like driving, I like road trips that are under 2-3 hours and I like seeing the countryside.

Lately I have become quite adept at using the cruise function on the RAV4. J's grama passed away last week and the funeral/celebration of life ceremony was this week. It was a sad time for the family but we feel so fortunate to be close enough to really help his folks through the process. This family occassion meant we travelled back and forth from Claresholm twice in the last 7 days. The kids handled the confinement well and the mountains were a spectacular sight yesterday afternoon.

On top of these trips to the farm, I also threw in a quick trip to Red Deer this past week. My darling sister arranged for me to finally get my haircut with her hairdresser (I think she was getting sick of looking at my mass of overgrown thick fuzzy hair which hadn't been cut in over 3 months). In exchange for taking care of my kids while I had my haircut, I took care of her youngest so she could parent volunteer (I think I came out ahead in this exchange of services). Our less than 48 hour trip was great as the kids wore each other out and I now sport a fabulous new hairstyle.

So as you can see I have been on the road alot. In total I have travelled 895 kilometres. Pretty impressive hey?! I am now ready for a few days of staying off the highway but I know the call of family and the desire for a cruise will beckon soon.

Bonafide Slurpee Lover

2008-11-18T19:37:00.000-08:00

As a child and teenager, I was known to purchase and drink a slurpee, froster or slushee. They were good on a hot day. It was always fun to mix flavours. Yet I did not fully appreciate the delights of this frozen carbonated beverage until I started dating J back in 91. My young long-haired boyfriend would actually stop at a 7 Eleven on a cold winter drive home from college in order to pick up a slurpee to tide him through the long drive. He swore the best slurpees were made in his hometown. The rationale behind his bias rested on the fact that there were two machines (holding 4 flavours a piece) in the store and a high volume of customers stopping to fill up with gas and grab a beverage. These two elements combined allowed for a variety of flavours, insured the slurpees did not sit for long in the machines and that consistency problems were quickly resolved.

J will seek out a slurpee in almost every North American town or city we need to stop in. Our 1995 road trip to move me from Calgary to live in sin with him in Ottawa meant seeking out 7 Eleven's with gas stations so we could have a slurpee fix to sustain us through the next few hundred kilometres. J is able to critic a slurpee with proficiency. His favourite flavour is Dr. Pepper. The delight on his face when a Dr. Pepper is on tap, its consistency is not watery and the flavour is true and untainted by a previous flavour is truly priceless to see. Yet J will resort to filling a 28 oz cup with Root Beer, Coca Cola, or Mountain Dew. I cannot mock his traditionalist tendencies as my flavour choice is limited to Sprite, 7-Up or grape. Plus the freaky flavours they come up with are so sugary sweet and artificial that you can't even work your way through my preferred 16 oz sized cup.

His slurpee addiction reached its height during the intense studying period for his Ph.D. comprehensive exams. Coincidently, the 7 Eleven was offering a two for one deal on slurpee at this time. I would often find one slurpee in his hand and another deligiently waiting for him in the freezer. Intervention became necessary and he weaned himself down to one or two a week in the height of summer.

We forever bemoan the state of slurpees in Ontario. They just don't measure up to our Alberta experiences. This weekend past, J and I had a chance to escape to Lethbridge without the children for 48 hours. J was giving a couple of presentations and my parents kindly took over the responsibility of our children's welfare and entertainment. It was a great trip to re-connect and remind ourselves about the importance of working on us as a couple. It was also a great trip for savouring in the delights of a slurpee. We stopped in his old hometown for a gas top up and a lovely slurpee beverage. He was of course delighted as Dr. Pepper was on tap. For our return trip we stopped at a Mac's Convenience Store for a cold beverage fix. Now Mac's does not sell Slurpees, they sell Frosters. Frosters are good and a close kissing cousin of a slurpee. The Mac's we stopped at in Lethbridge had 4 machines running, that means 16 flavours. As a result, I was able to obtain my favourite flavour, Sprite mixed with grape.

I will forever smile when I see him repeatedly tap a slurpee cup against his leg to mix it up (heaven forbid if you compromise a slurpee by stirring it with a straw or moving the straw to a different spot). I secretly delight at seeing him introduce the beverage to our young son. I have grown to enjoy this frozen beverage almost as much as I have grown to love my husband, my bonafide slurpee fanatic.

My baby is two!

2008-11-09T21:23:00.000-08:00

November 7th, 2006. My darling daughter's birthday, my second birthing day. My lil bug was eight days late but once my labour started it flew by in a flurry. Thankfully the midwives arrived at my home 30 minutes before her arrival. I feel blessed to have delivered a healthy baby in the comfort of my home. Home birthing was a choice I made with determination, contentment and joy.

The first year of my girl's life was tough for me. We endured sleep problems, breastfeeding complications, sibling rivalry and post-partum depression. With the support of my spouse, family and friends plus a willingness to seek medical help, I struggled through the year and found special moments to revel in the development of my girl.

Today my lil bug is sweet, determined, dramatic and smart. She is energetic and always on the move. She is constantly surprising me with her new found knowledge and verbal communication. I love her enthusiasm for life. She loves books, puzzles, animals, and vehicles. She is fascinated by fire engines. When looking at a book of vehicles, she commented "I grow up be fire driver."

My girl can negotiate too. She is constantly countering my 2 minutes with "no...five more minutes." She looks up to her brother and imitates him in many ways but also knows how to push his buttons, stand her ground and be her own self. She likes to parrot us. I dropped some balsamic vinegar and hastily said 'oh crapper' which she kindly repeated for us (ad naseum).

She can test my patience as she has a very determined streak. She can work herself into a frenzy over an "injustice." Yet after the storm she likes to say "momma hug" and my heart melts and remembers the beauty of her soul.

She likes to make people laugh. For instance, one night when we were dining with my family, she sniffed and said "smell garbage." Well this caused all of us to just roar with laughter and to this day she likes to pull this phrase out to make us giggle. She finds it quite a hoot to flick her bedroom lights on and off when she wakes in the morning as she knows it will draw me from my bed so she can say "momma wake up now, shh daddy sleepin."

Despite the frustrations that come with parenting a two year old, I delight in the little person she is becoming.

Happy birthday my beautiful and strong girl!

Family

2008-11-06T21:59:00.000-08:00

Most families moan about each others quirks and puzzle their way through connecting but when push comes to shove we need our family. I'm fortunate enough to have a great family. Yah, I butt heads with my dad, mainly due to being cut from the same cloth but with different reference points and experience to colour my views. I probably test my mom's patience and her stamina for constantly bolstering my confidence. My sister most likely grows weary of my bossy tendencies and lofty ideals. Yet we all get along and not just the "put on a good face" get along. There is something so amazing about being loved for no other reason than just because.

Hence, the absolute best part about our sojourn in Alberta is being near our families. We now have regular opportunities to see each other. J's folks pop into town and we can meet up with them for a quick visit or lunch. I can run into my mom's house to steal cornflake crumbs for my dinner and leave with not only the bag of cornflake crumbs but a full belly since she has fed me and the wee people lunch. My sis can actually arrange a haircut appointment with her hairdresser for me. This appointment means she has found a way for me and the kids to visit her along with a time when I can let her volunteer in her son's classroom because I will be available to watch her daughter for a couple hours. It is so nice to have regular contact with family. We are enjoying the everyday without the intense commitment of a long visit. Long visits are necessary when we live far apart but sometimes the 7-10 days can wear all parties out. These long visits alter everyone's routine, there are always space issues and the pressure of making the trip memorable so that it will sustain us until the next visit.

Living close to family means we can participate in and share memorable events with family. My mom turned 65 on Sunday and we were there to share in the celebration. My sister had the great idea of throwing her a surprise party. She rounded up a large group of family and friends to attend. Jo and I were then able to work together in her kitchen to put out a decent spread of munchies and sweets for everyone. It was fun spending time with her. It was great being able to surprise my mom and to remind her how special she is to us and to alot of other people. Now my lil bug turns two tomorrow and I can have a family party for her. She is geniunely thrilled about having her bompa, grandma, grammie, grandad, auntie jo, unc brad and her cousins in her house.

I think I will miss my family even more upon our return to Ottawa this time. I am quickly adjusting to the knowledge that I have a grandparent practically always available to help in a pinch or for a break or because I want to do something with just my husband or just one child. I am growing accustomed to integrating family into not only the special holidays and events but the everyday.

Thankfully my friends in Ottawa are a form of family for me. I miss them and am desperately lonely for the inspiration, support and conversation they provide me. Yet like ourselves they are busy with work, activities and some with raising families. As a result, finding time to go out together is limited. We cannot just offer to babysit each other's kids on a whim as it requires logistical manuevering. It is too bad that our lifestyle choices have meant that our lives (children, friends, home, and jobs) are so physically far from where our relatives reside. I like Ottawa and at this moment I choose to make it home. I just wish I could reap the benefits of having nearby family as well.

So for the rest of our stay in Alberta, I will be reminding myself on the dark and dreary cold winter days that my restlessness and boredom can be alleviated by not only calling family but by entering their homes and allowing them to give me a break from parenting.

My view

2008-10-30T22:02:00.000-07:00

This is what takes my breath away each and every day, whether I am driving, looking out our balcony window or going for a walk.

These pictures were taken three weeks ago when the sky was clear. I took the kids for a walk to the open space (affectionately known as the field) behind our townhouse. By simply facing south and west, I was greeted by a spectacular view of the mountains. I can not grow weary of seeing them. The novelty remains and will continue to fascinate me. My monkey boy has even picked up on my awe and will often proclaim "I can see the Rocky Mountains, Momma, their beautiful!" If you look carefully, you can see Canada Olympic Park from our position in Calgary.

I am slightly saddened that fall is quickly coming to a close. Halloween always marks the change for me. I love Halloween. Not the scary stuff mind you but the dressing up, the pretending, the excitement, the darkness and the mystery. Yet Halloween seems to herald winter into our lives. Don't get me wrong, on the whole I like winter. I love the first snowfall. I adore watching large flakes float down from the sky. I even like to shovel (though last winter wore me out). I like skating, making snow butterflies (monkey boy's one time term for snow angels), drinking hot chocolate, bundling up under blankets and feeling the peace that muffles the noises of the city. I just grow weary of the continual cold weather, the slogging through snow and ice to appointments, and the gray days. I hate gray days.

I am looking forward to seeing how winter changes the hills and mountains around us. I delight in the idea of enduring a chinook wind (as long as I am safely off bridges) in order to receive a treat of warmer weather and clearer roads. I hope I can revel in an Alberta winter and have my children understand that sometimes you can actually see the ground for most of the winter months.

Toddler temper

2008-10-22T13:33:00.000-07:00

My lil bug is fun, energetic and smart but her temper is almost too much to bear sometimes. Her frustration over not getting her way results in these fantastic emotional meltdowns. I will admit I am not as diligent or creative as I should be in handling these tantrums. Generally I keep her well-fed, well-rested, and active but my diversion techniques seem to always fall short. I attempt to let her exercise her independence by providing choice between limited options. Yet lil bug's verbal ability combined with her willpower means that she likes to refuse my choices and present another undesirable option. Sometimes I don't re-direct fast enough as I am occupied with her brother. Sometimes I do everything in my power and still a tantrum ensues. And boy do the meltdowns last long. For instance, supper last night meant having lil bug scream for 25 minutes and then she only ate five bites of rice before being excused from the table. I'm slowly learning that I need to let the temper episode take its course before I help her label her feelings and attempt to coerce her into appropriate behavior. Yet it is hard to remain patient and calm during the screaming and crying. I have resorted to removing her from the room just so I could regain my composure (though sometimes she thinks she wins as she doesn't have do to what I ask). I have even yelled at her and told her she was a bad girl. Lately I find that my sanity remains if I can just laugh at the absurdity of it all or capture it on camera. The camera is a wonderful tool that allows me to be just the observer and not a direct participant in the ordeal. Hopefully with time and consistency I can learn to work with these tantrums. Until then, who will "reign supreme" in the battle of wills? Stay tuned for the final verdict...someday in the very distant future.

Parent Volunteer

2008-10-17T21:39:00.000-07:00

I did it. I volunteered in monkey boy's preschool class today. Curiosity was getting the better of me and overrode my hesitations about volunteering. It went really well. Monkey boy was glad to have me there. It was interesting to see how he is doing in this new situation, how he interacts with other children and what type of things they do with the children. The teacher is nice and well-educated. She genuinely cares for the students and attempts to provide learning opportunities based on their class themes. The assistants provide good role models, kindness and instruction/direction. I'm glad I went even if I was worried about interfering and had insisted on downplaying the value of this type of educational instruction (silly of me to feel this way but those feelings were there).

The best part was my son sharing his favourite toy with the class. Each child's family takes a few turns in the year to provide snacks. On a child's snack day they become the special helper. They get to flick lights, lead groups to different rooms, and share with the class something special. Monkey boy shared his monkey with his class. This monkey is a stuffed pluffie toy by TY named Baby Clarence. I bought it for him when he was 6 months old and we were desperately working on his sleep habits (since he only slept in 45 minutes to 1.5 hours blocks and constantly needed the touch of his parents to return to sleep). He continues to sleep with Baby Clarence and uses him in lots of imaginative play. BTW I have 3 Baby Clarences in our house, though only one is in circulation and currently my son favours the original. I was very proud of my kid presenting a very personal and important toy in his life. He did not fear being teased or questioned for his choice of toy. He was so excited to share. The children asked some good questions and he answered in a very direct sweet way. This sharing moment made me realize he is going to be okay. He will grow to be a confident child and adult. He will not be ashamed of being affectionate. He will be willing to defend his choice. He loves his momma. And I love him.

There will be more volunteer work in my future when it comes to my kids. I want to be a part of their ever-changing lives and to have them know I care and want to understand their world. I will try to worry less about my perception of things and just go with the flow (or so I hope).

Thanksgiving

2008-10-17T21:23:00.000-07:00

We spent most of the weekend at the farm. It was cold outside and very low key but it was a warm cozy weekend for me. I managed to find a few spare moments for myself. I worked a little on some knitting and whole lot on relaxing. The kids had different toys and people to entertain them. I had the luxury of making play dough without trying to do ten other things. I was even able to help out in the kitchen without children underfoot. My mom-in-law prepared terrific meals and had way too many goodies on hand (brownies and cinnamon buns found their way past my lips one too many times).

We even squeezed in some family time with my side on Monday. I am having so much fun just watching my sister's and my kids spending time together. Jo and I were privileged enough to grow up knowing and enjoying the company of two very special cousins. The enchantment and nostalgia I feel towards my grandad's farm is intrinsically tied to the memories we created with M and G. It is nice to see our own children finding some unique special cousin moments themselves. My mom put on a wonderful meal (even if I had to tease her that it was all leftovers...she had cooked a ham on Saturday for her and dad and then put on a low key turkey dinner on Sunday for Jo and her family).

Thanksgiving is such a great time to remember your blessings and treasures. I am truly thankful for family. I am thankful for this time we have together. I am thankful to be fully present in these moments.

Calgary weather tip #1

2008-10-15T14:11:00.000-07:00

Avoid windstorms.

I'm not sure if I can stress this enough but, at all costs, I highly recommend staying inside when a windstorm blows through cowtown. Even if this means missing a child's naptime, dealing with irritable children and hanging out at Eau Claire Market (which has become a superb example of a city's failure to create a humming marketplace). If you fail to heed this warning, the following true story may be your own.

On October 7th 2008, I woke to a beautiful day. The weather report predicted a warm, sunny fall day and indicated that cool weather and rain was due to arrive by the following morn. I decided we needed to enjoy the fresh air and sunshine while we could. So I threw the kids into the vehicle and off we went to Prince's Island. The playground was busy with a couple of daycare groups but the kids enjoyed themselves nonetheless. We meandered past a couple of art sculptures and dawdled by the lagoon watching the fountain and ducks.

Monkey boy thought we should eat out for lunch. As I neglected to pack a lunch and the cupboard was bare at home, I acquiesced to monkey boy's request. We trudged over to Eau Claire Market discovered a neat indoor playground and found a meager and slightly unsatisfying lunch. The time on the parking meter was ticking down so we finally hustled out the door to make our way across the island and suspension bridge to the parking lot. When we entered the building the day was beautiful and we had all shed our coats, but when we left there was this huge dark cloud looming in the northwest sky. Monkey boy commented that a storm must be coming. I agreed but mentally "knew" it was most likely just a small rain storm passing through the city for the bad weather wasn't due to arrive until the next day...right?! Plus the weather report mustn't have changed as there were packs of people running, rollerblading or walking on their lunch break.

We quickly made our way across the small island and were about to step on the bridge when the air temperature dropped. I told monkey boy to put on his fleecy coat while I donned mine. Lil bug was strapped into a cozy stroller and being in a typical 2 year old mode refused to put on a coat. I didn't have the patience to insist, so I jammed her coat and monkey's extra coat onto the top of the stroller. The kids wanted to throw the leaves we had collected earlier over the bridge edge but by now the wind had picked up and we had 5 minutes left on the meter. I insisted we hustle across the bridge along with the throng of runners. One third of the way across, the storm hit. You literally could see it hit us. The wind gusted and felt like a wall had hit us. The sky grew gray and dismal. Fellow bridge users were running at a funny angle and two roller bladers were clinging to the edge.

Fear entered my soul. I had one hand clamped to the stroller and the other hand became a vice grip on monkey boy's wrist. In my calmest voice I told him we needed to run so we wouldn't get wet. Really all I cared about was getting the hell off the bridge. (Have I told you that I have a fear of falling into water, wild water like a river or ocean...this fear has gripped me in the past (walking a trail in Scotland and hiking parts of the West Coast Trail) but has never come to anything).

We were about halfway across the part of the bridge spanning the river when monkey boy's coat flew off the stroller. My little worry wart son yelled that we had to get his coat. I stepped on it and bent down to retrieve it. It was then, I lost my grip on the stroller. It slammed into the guard rail. Thankfully this act only flung and pinned my daughter's coat into the fence. My panic level was escalating, my mind was racing about what to do. My son wanted to grap his sister's coat worrying that it was going to go into the water. My daughter started crying and wanted me to carry her. I couldn't take her out of the stroller and risk her flying out of my arms or not having a hand free for my son. I did not want to let go of my children. My hands were holding onto the lives of the two things most dear to me in the world. My body was being buffeted by the wind, my eyes only saw the river turning and rushing below.

Strangers stepped into my little scene. A gentleman and lady shouted above the wind saying they had the boy's coat, monkey boy grabbed his sister's coat (fearing nothing but losing a coat), they helped me straighten the stroller and gave me the confidence to not only jam the jackets further into the stroller but to move from that spot. Another man asked if I was going his way and could he help me push the stroller. Unfortunately, I was racing the opposite way. We faced the wind together, bent ourselves forward and waded through the gusts to the end of the bridge. Away from the river, the wind was more manageable. We rushed to the vehicle just as the onslaught of rain arrived. I held my sobbing daughter in my arms before buckling her safely into her carseat. I hugged my son and told him he was brave and a very good helper. I sat behind the wheel of my car, a little shaky.

We made it home. Later I found out the wind surprised almost everyone. The wind blew from 70 to 100 km/hr. It made the headlines for the day.

You may think I am being melodramatic. Perhaps. Yet the fear was real. The events were surreal and shocking to me. I have experienced the power of Alberta winds in the past. I grew up in this delightful province. I have seen many chinook winds chase winter away from Calgary and surrounding areas. I even lived in the windy city of Alberta, Lethbridge, for close to a year and walked home fom the University of Lethbridge in a 100km wind gusts (I shaved 15 minutes off my walk that day). Yet I have never experienced a fright like this. I am glad to be a mother because it has put a different spin on life for me. I am no longer the reckless crusader seeking self-gratification but a protector of her young. I'm a mother bear who will now avoid dark looming clouds and will deal with the inconvenience of restless, tired children for the sake of avoiding another storm.

Mountain escape

2008-10-04T22:06:00.001-07:00

Fine weather once again prodded us into exploring our new/home province. We donned our tourist hats, buckled the wee people into the vehicle and headed west to the mountains. The breath-taking, majestic rocky mountains. Our destination were the hot springs in Banff National Park. I was inspired to see the Cave and Basin National Historic Site while watching an episode of "This is Emily Yeung" where she went to the hot springs. Now this may be a strange source for learning about tourist destinations but remember my days are filled with entertaining a 4.5 year old and almost 2 year old. This means that most of the dvds I sit down to watch are found in the children's section of our public library. I'm just thankful I am not looking for a way to visit Elmo on Sesame Street.

We made our way to Banff Upper Hot Springs on Sulphur Mountain, bypassing the busy town of Banff and all the tourons shopping (a touron is a cross between a tourist and a moron, this term was created by some fellow exhibit interpreters when I worked at Heritage Park many moons ago). The kids were thrilled to be going swimming in a warm pool. Monkey boy's enthusiasm was infectious as he darted and charged his way up the short hill to the facility. We paid the admission price, wiggled into our swimsuits and headed for the pool. Initially I was a little disappointed by the small size of the pool and its upkeep (there were some parts in decay, poorly patched and blocked off) but that feeling floated away with steam. The air was cool and the mineral water temperature was 39 degrees celsius. It created a wonderful atmosphere of steamy air (even if it had a slight sulphur smell to it). It must be spectacular sitting in the hot springs pool while big snowflakes float down from the sky (hmm, maybe J and I could escape some weekend to Radium Hot Springs for some couple time this winter).

Monkey boy fell in love with being in the warm water and having a sense of independence in the shallow areas. Lil bug clung to me without relent for about 15 minutes (personally, I loved ever minute of needing her momma). Eventually she relaxed, enjoyed splashing me and watching her legs float. After about 45 minutes of sitting and floating, we departed the luxury of the pool and left subdued, sporting lobster legs and aura of the fully relaxed (although for some reason my lil bug was strangely energized and very animated for the next couple of hours).

We worked our way back around the mountain to the Cave and Basin Historic Site. We ate a small packed lunch supplemented with chips and a sandwich from the cafe kiosk before checking out the site. We ventured into the cave first. It was not a very far jaunt nor was it mysterious but it allowed us to smell the sulphur and see the original space that was discovered so long ago (and which initiated the start of our national park system). Monkey boy's attention span was limited. He just wanted to check out each place and then quickly move onto the next. This meant we didn't dawdle or check out every exhibit. However, we managed to enjoy seeing the place and foster his wonder in life. The basin is now a protected site for the Banff Springs snail. This snail only exists here. After carefully looking we managed to see a few snails. They are very small. So small that we were on our hands and knees peering over the boardwalk edge all the while trying not to touch or disturb the water. I think I was a little overzealous in my precaution and desire to follow the rules that I ended up becoming a bit tense during this section of our visit (despite my hot springs relaxation therapy) and was often halting the children's progress in leaning over the water.

The water in the basin was amazing. The aqua colour was beautiful and even the algae growing in it had a sense of beauty to it. You could see right to the bottom and watch the bubbles burst from the earth and travel up to the top. It was absolutely fascinating seeing the earth fart. (BTW if you don't know already know, I think "farts" are hilarious. It is the one form of bathroom humour that still brings out the giggles).

We ended our trip with a walk on the discovery trail. This boardwalk took us a short way up the mountain to see the top of the cave as well as the natural springs and waterflow around the area. It was such a pretty walk. The air was crisp and clear (though slightly sulphur-tinged), the colours were spectacular, and the place was quiet.

We returned to the vehicle, tired but sated. After tanking up with coffee for J and a chai latte (my beverage weakness), we travelled home through the glorious mountains while the wee people slept. Our next adventure...unknown but perhaps "This is Emily Yeung" will inspire me again (or maybe I can look up something on the internet).

Keeping busy with the little things

2008-10-01T21:02:00.001-07:00

I had a fabulous weekend at my sister's house. It is so nice to spend time with another mom, especially one who totally gets all my quirks and history (and likes me still). It was also nice to compare parenting notes. We both have two children, a girl and a boy, who have distinct personalities and we both find that keeping positive and energized isn't always easy or possible. I'm fortunate to have a sister who is so honest, funny and just plain loving. Thanks Jo for being you! Sharing time with Jo and her family means I am getting to know my niece and nephew more. It is taking me outside of my little narrow sphere of parenting and own children's interests and teaching me to be an aunt who is open to differences and new things. I'm learning a lot about superheroes but I think I have a long ways to go. We didn't manage to go far afield, just the backyard and the nearby parks (which btw are awesome) but we did squeeze in a girlie movie.

After the weekend, I returned to my regular routine with the kids and J, i.e. wake-up, eat, go to preschool or a park, eat, put lil bug down for a nap, entertain monkey boy, snack, prepare supper, play outside, eat supper, go for walk and go to bed. As you may have noticed we need to eat...lots. Thankfully, J helps with the suppers (especially with the meal planning and grocery shopping) so that isn't so much a chore. The snacks and lunches are becoming a challenge. It is hard to be creative and healthy at the same time. Although, the wee people are traditionalists and seem to thrive on repetition, I'm getting bored. I grabbed a book from the library titled Lunch box : creative recipes for everyday lunches. I have yet to properly look through it and mark potentials. I hope it isn't just geared for adults or non-fussy eaters.

The weather has been great here this week. This means getting outside and trying new parks is high on the list. I dragged the wee people to Prince's Island near downtown Calgary. It is a nice oasis with groomed lawns, lots of trees, an art walk, lagoon with fountain and quiet places. It also has a kickin' playground with Calgary themes interspersed into the structure. There is the Eau Claire Express train (three structures linked with slides and climbing areas and train facade), Fort Calgary (filled with climbing and slides), and Shakespeare in the Park kiosk to name a few. The kidlets loved it and wore themselves out. They also loved the suspension style bridge over the river and traffic lanes. It made me a little nervous seeing how willing they were to go near the edge to see the water flow. I try so hard to suppress my fears and not transmit them onto the kids but OMG we were on a bridge with water flowing under it. Pretty sight yes, but it filled me with a slight terror and angst alongside a non-stop visual of all the horrible what if scenarios I dreamed up. I didn't truly relax until we were safely going down the ramp on the other side of the bridge. It probably would have been less stressful if I hadn't encouraged a sense of wonder with throwing leaves into the water and watching them float down the river.

Well another day awaits and I am not sure what to do with it. Hopefully inspiration will hit in the morning before I hear the 8:30am chant "what are we going to do today?" You know, I really shouldn't have used my weekly library visit on Tuesday night.

Public libraries rock

2008-09-25T22:27:00.000-07:00

A mere 10 minute drive away exists a respite for me. It is our local public library. It is a large one story building set on a hill (NW Calgary requires it of course). It overlooks a shopping district and more importantly a spectacular view of the mountains and COP (Calgary Olympic Park). The collection is large and current, the facility has comfy seating as well as kid-oriented tables along with easy access shelving plus there is a couple of preschool-aged computer work stations. The wee people love it. We seem to always leave the place with a canvas tote full of books and DVDs. I discovered today that it even offers some drop-in family storytime for 2-5 year olds (hmm, need to drag monkey boy and lil bug away from computer and into the story room for a half hour...sometimes). The wee people like to wander around the children's area looking for books. It is fun to see them excited about books. Lil bug focuses on "potty" books (a project we are introducing slowly) as well as boat and farm books. Monkey boy gravitates to anything with vehicles and occassionally throws in something else that catches his eyes.

This library provides a necessary sanity break to my Thursdays, more importantly to my week at home. It allows us to venture away from our four walls and multitude of stairs to a safe environment. It is taking time for me to adjust to this full-time mothering gig. I like it but it is rather lonely and sometimes dull. Creativity in engaging the kids only comes to me in flitting moments. Plus finding venues to interact with other moms and toddler or preschoolers are few and far between unless you hang out at a mall, fork over cash for organized activities, or find the will power and interest to join mommy groups. So for now the library is going to be one of our favourite hang-outs. I like it there and I like finding books.

Saturday escape

2008-09-22T19:27:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday was outstanding! We put on our "tourist" hats, drove the cowboy trail and met J's folks at Bar U Ranch. We were greeted by this "billboard":

Yah, I started to think we had entered the twilight zone of redneck land with this over the top beef industry propaganda. Fortunately, the beautiful ranch land and foothills in the background spoke to me. Landscape in my opinion can and will trump any human endeavour. Plus ultimately I do respect people who try to make their livelihood from the land.

The ranch was lovely. It provided a taste of the "cowboy" life. Most of the buildings were restored and included some nice displays of artifacts and storyboards. No cattle on the grounds but a few horses were around. The ranch operated a wagon driven by the horses named "Hawkeye" and "Trapper" which appealed to J's and my nostalgia for the movie and tv show M.A.S.H.

We more or less had the place to ourselves...definitely not a tourist trap on the day we were there. The grandparents loved snapping photos of the wee people and relaying their knowledge to them. There were fresh cookies at the ranch house, coffee from a pot over an open fire, a creek running through the property, horses to pat, and open space. Though the moutains were shrouded in haze, their presence was felt and added to the landscape in a remarkable way.

Driving home was relaxing and entertaining. We passed a few miles of fench posts topped with baseball caps. Drove by a busy coffee shop, Navajo Mug, in Longview owned by Ian Tyson. We saw numerous bikers, both motor and pedal. As we moved from the south to the north, we moved through ranch land, forest, creeks. The wonderful space was fabulous eye candy and you can see why it is often used as a setting in movies like Unforgiven and Brokeback Mountain. Heck, Alberta tourism even encourages visiting Kananaskis Country and Cowboy Country through their Reel Adventures road trips. Rest assured I will only take my tourist inclinations so far and will not become a "star" seeker. Honest!

Shuswap Lake recap and other stuff

2008-09-16T21:18:00.000-07:00

Warning: this is a long-winded post, peruse at your own risk. BTW most of my posts will be long-winded. It is just who I am. I am no longer ashamed of this fact but rather I embrace it. So enjoy as best as you can.

Finally some computer time. J was discouraged when the first loaned computer had a motherboard problem. Thankfully, his folks have a number of used computers kicking about and he could mix and match some components and create a computer for us. So beyond having a lovely time at the farm (again) this weekend, we also scored a computer.

With a functioning computer, I am now able download some pics from my camera and J's. All of the pictures (good and bad) reminded me how much we have done in such a short time. The trip to Shuswap Lake was good. The wee people connected with their cousins, grandparents, aunt and uncle. Monkey boy marvelled at the wit, strength and charm of his uncle and tried to keep pace with his older cousin. Lil bug took a long time to warm up to anyone but grandad and her eldest cousin and became quite the momma's girl. She shied from her auntie but eventually warmed up to her, sort-of.

The drive to the resort was straight-forward but looong. Sitting in my parent's truck between my two kids in the back seat grew a little tiresome. By the time we reached our destination (over 9 hours after leaving Calgary), I was hungry, feeling out of control and tired of monitoring the behaviour of two wee people (which other than the last 15 minutes was pretty amazing). As a result I unfortunately blew up at one of the people I hold dearest to my heart, my mom. She confronted my attitude a bit, gave me space and reminded me she understood and wasn't mad. I hope I have apologized to her appropriately. Why oh why do we revert back to our teen personas when we are around our parents. I wasn't wild about my teen self and I definitely want to shed the insecurity and defiance I held towards my parents during those years. Hindsight is always 20/20. Thus whenever possible I will try to check my defensiveness at the door, I will insure I ingest healthy food regularily, and I will try to remember that being grumpy is not to my benefit. I sure hope I can remember these important life tips.

Other than the drive, our vacation at the resort went very well. Our time was taken up with the kids but with their ages (all 5 and under) we knew that this would be the case. My wee people enjoyed the creek, rocky beach, lake and small playground area. Alot of time was spent sending boats down the creek to the lake, throwing rocks, hauling water from the lake to the water hole on the beach, going for walks and following the wee people on their bikes and scooters down a paved road. We managed to dine outside all but one night. We crowded around two picnic tables with wine and food. When the wee people finished eating, they moved to the play structure while we finished our meal. Truly a civilized way of vacationing especially considering my mom took the responsibility of preparing the majority of the week's evening meals.

Some early evenings included a rousing game of hide n sneak (as monkey boy calls it). This really should be a straight-forward, risk-free child's game. Not so with me. What happened was this: I was it (along with lil bug who was in my arms due to being shy), I counted, everyone hid, I went searching for people...sounds normal right except...I chased people to the home free rock and I tumbled. Yup with child in arms I chose to run up a set of stairs to catch someone before they were home free and I wiped out. I saved the kid...not a bruise to be found on her but my hand and knee took the brunt of my pleasure in play (and my slightly competitive nature). Check out the picture. This is a few days after said accident but it shows the damage of playing without good shoes on or arms free.

One thing I managed to do for myself on the vacation was swim in the lake. I love water. I love feeling water surround and buoy my body to the surface. The lake was cold and the ground was rocky but I put on a pair of sandals, waded a bit and plunged in. It was divine. I partook in this secret pleasure twice. The second time was slightly warmer and I managed to submerge my whole self without having to resort to those OMG it is sooo cold shrieks.

J drove out half way through the holiday and I was glad he made it. Plus we got to break in our new vehicle (2008 Toyota Rav4, sport model) by driving it home through the mountains. The trip home was less stressful as we were returning to the known. I enjoyed being in the moutains. I forgot how when you were really close to them, their magnitude diminishes. I was disappointed around Golden and Field and surprised by my reaction to being close to Rocky Mountains. Yet as we approached and passed Lake Louise, Banff and Canmore, I again marveled at the magnificent beauty that nature has created from valleys, rocks, trees and rivers. The river had that unmistakable emerald blue, the sun shined brightly from behind us and the storm clouds dissipated as we rode on the highway in the valley amongst the mountains. We didn't see any animals along the way other than the birds, insects and a chipmunk but it was nature nonetheless that I enjoyed is so much more than humankind's imprint on the terrain.

Well that is my vacation recap. Now for current news. The weather has improved around here. Positively wonderful to be honest. It has been plus 26 celsius the last two days. I managed to drag the wee people to the community centre playground yesterday. It proved to be a longer walk home due to exhaustion, heat, water pit stops and the bloody hill. Calgary's NW seems to be built on hills. This makes for breath-taking views but gives the old out of shape body a major workout (picture of our view from the hill in the field behind our house will be posted someday cuz it will make yah jealous). To further take advantage of the fine weather, I went to the zoo today with my mom and the wee people. The Calgary zoo was a blast. Monkey boy enjoyed running, listening to the recorded messages about animals and seeing the baby giraffe while lil bug found the ducks roaming free and the baby elephant to be the highlights of her day. It was a great way to spend the day.

Tomorrow will hopefully hold good times as well. I've been struggling to form a routine and rhythm to the day that the kids and I can live with and hopefully thrive in. Monkey boy seems to like preschool but is having a hard time with drop-offs. I really hate leaving him there when he is on the verge of tears. Transition and change...not the best thing for him. At least, I feel like monkey boy and I are finding ways of bonding. He seems to love the quiet play we have when lil bug is sleeping and we pretend his stuffed animals want to have sleepovers and playdates. My lil bug is a challenge lately. I truly adore her, her physical and verbal abilities and her strong independent nature. She loves to tell stories, sing songs, recap her days, play pretend, try to use the potty and get dressed or undressed almost by herself. However her emotions run rampant. She can be sweet and pleasant then a tornado of sadness, anger and indignation (often because I need her to get dressed and I offered the wrong choice of clothes, i.e. they weren't pink in colour, where did this fashion diva come from...definitely not me). I need to find a way to deal with her outbursts and her complete meltdowns. I can only handle so much crying, whining and floor slithering. Yet, how can I remain frustrated when she perches on my back, takes hold of the ties of my headband and repeats (ad nauseum) giddy up horsie.

Settling in...sort-of

2008-09-11T09:10:00.000-07:00

We are in our rental place. It is nice and fairly spacious for a townhouse with lots of stairs. The wee people are settling in. They are discovering new and annoying things to try...such as flicking lights and fans on and off repetitively because they are flat switches located very low on the wall. My sister and her friends spoiled us by supplying a couple bins of toys for the wee people. Monkey boy and lil bug loving delving into them and playing with the farm, castle, ice cream shop and cars. Big thanks to them.

My in-laws brought a computer up for us to use yesterday. However, we need to find some kind of desk before we can set it up and I can finally download some pictures into it. I miss playing with photos. I didn't realize how much I enjoy telling a story by referencing to a picture, how much I want to use pictures to capture moments and feelings and how much I want to improve my photo skills (composition and technique). This realization is definitely fueling my desire to take my love of photography and digital photo-processing and develop it into a useful skill.

Monkey boy started preschool on Monday. It is 3 times a week for 2 hours in the morning. As with anything new, he greeted the change with apprehension and limited excitement. I think it will prove a useful exercise in the long term as it will allow him to continue to develop his social skills, learn some basics and keep him in the educational loop since he is missing jr. kindergarten in Ottawa. The preschool seems well set-up, his educator is nice and omg I have to do volunteer work. Yup I signed up to help with the scrapbooking project plus I will have to supply snacks once and awhile and assist in the classroom on occassion. I'm not sure if I am ready to embrace the social aspect of parenting. In theory I enjoy interacting with people and participating. I often thrive on it. However, I too can be apprehensive or worry too much about how others perceive me, especially when I think the other moms already know each other and have solid friendships or acquaintances. Also I find as I age and become a mother bear in some instances, I am more selective in the friendships I develop and tend to only seek satisfying interactions with like minded individuals. I wonder if these moms will be like-minded especially in light of the fact that many seem to take this preschool business pretty seriously. There were a few parents who had dressed the kids up and were taken multitude of pictures as they entered the community centre and classrooms. I didn't think a two hour program 3 times a week meant first day of school. Yah it is exciting and a big experience but really now. Or perhaps I should be feeling guilty for not taking monkey boy's picture.

Today is a day off from commitments. I brought the kids over to the parentals so I could blog and steal a library card. Now we are off to the library and hopefully some groceries. I hope it is a day without frustrations (for the wee people and me too).

Overall impressions

2008-09-06T20:49:00.000-07:00

We have returned from our week long trip to St. Ives Resort on the Shuswap. As I am tired and completely unable to spell let alone form a coherent thought, I am only leaving these point form notes as a teaser (and reminder for me).

the Rocky Mountains are amazing, magnificent and slightly different than I remembered
rivers and lakes in the mountains are clear and often "emerald" in colour
the trees are different in BC and AB (how quickly I have forgotten the western feel of fall time)
driving a full day for a holiday is over-rated
hide n seek has proven hazardous for me
grumpiness overtakes me when I feel out-of-control, tired, hungry or restless (combining any two or more of these elements spells disaster and a situation I need to work on -- a necessary project to remedy soon esp. before a trip with girlfriends in Jan 09)
B.C. beaches are rocky and the water is COLD but a quick swim is sooo refreshing
creating family memories and watching your children experience something new is priceless

We are here!

2008-08-28T09:15:00.000-07:00

Packing is done, boxes have been shipped and our personal belongings have been organized and stored in our house. The 4 hour flight with the wee people went fantastic. I received multiple compliments from the airline crew about how well the kids managed the flight. The shocker was that they attributed their good behavior partially due to my being so relaxed and calm. Wow, this must be one of the first times I've ever heard I was relaxed and calm. Normally I need to be fussing about something, organizing something else or hovering over people. Hmm, maybe heading west for a sabbatical from regular life is going to be a very, very good thing.

I'm slowly starting to settle in. It feels like we are on a holiday but not a holiday. I think I just need to resign myself to being a suitcase dweller for another 10 days, consider it a holiday and then worry about settling into Calgary living and our rental place.

My folks have been spoiling us with a stocked fridge, home cooked meals, and absolutely nothing to clean or fix. They have also provided some valuable entertainment for the wee people. This means J and I have had some time to converse without interruption (very useful since we have decided to buy a new vehicle after selling our other two before we moved...which is proving to be very time consuming and taxing mentally and emotionally).

Currently we are spending a day and a bit at J's folks. They live on a farm in Southern Alberta. I love visiting this place! It truly is a different pace of life. J's folks love spending time with the kids and just don't fuss in the same way my mom, dad and I do (a good and necessary change once and awhile). Food is put on the table, people occasionally drop in, sometimes you need to run into town for supplies or to visit but these errands become an event. For instance, Grandpa took monkey boy into town (15 min drive) to drop garbage off at the dump, see Gr. Grandma for coffee at the DQ (don't ask long story, small town), buy some groceries and get a new life jacket for monkey boy. Grandma is outside entertaining our lil bug and I am sitting here, typing, listening to the wind and breathing, just breathing.

Next adventure, cottage resort time at Shuswap Lake in British Columbia. Long drive but family time for us, my folks, and my sister and her family. I'm so excited!

I should be ...

2008-08-15T09:54:00.001-07:00

I'm procastinating. Big surprise. In just over 10 days, we are temporarily displacing ourselves. We are taking a few possessions (okay, more boxes of stuff than my idealistic "live simple" self should take for a 10 month sojourn), renting a furnished condo, and hauling ourselves and our two wee people away from the nation's capital. We are journeying back to our home province, to where the prairies meet the mountains. My partner, J, will have a chance to spend his sabbatical year immersed in writing and we will both have a chance to enjoy our children with our families.

It should be a great "adventure" away from regular life. We have an opportunity to explore our home province as tourists. We have grandparents to help with the kids (babysitters = couple as well as me time). It will be great. I should be packing!!